Man Does DNA Test on Daughter behind Wife’s Back — His Family Insisted She Looked ‘Much Darker’ than Him

A fair-skinned father grew concerned as his daughter's complexion darkened and her hair developed kinkier curls. Family suspicions mounted, accusing his wife of infidelity. Under pressure, he went behind his wife's back and conducted a DNA test. Please keep reading to uncover what happened next.

In June 2022, an anonymous female poster, aged 30, turned to the "Relationship Advice" subreddit to share a perplexing family situation involving her three-year-old daughter. Her husband, aged 29 and of Serbian descent, belonged to a family with very fair skin. The woman, who identified as Brazilian/American, described her own light brown complexion and mixed ethnicity.

This contrasted sharply with her husband's family, which was uniformly fair-skinned. Her own family background added complexity: her father was extremely fair-skinned, while her mother, despite being estranged from the family, had a visibly mixed heritage, appearing slightly darker than her siblings. Despite this distance, the woman maintained a close bond with her maternal relatives.

Why Were OP's In-Laws Curious about Her Daughter's Appearance?

Continuing her narrative, the woman emphasized the strong family bonds she shared with her husband, often visiting his extended family to provide their daughter with a rich cultural experience. Despite their close-knit interactions, a new concern emerged regarding their daughter's changing appearance.

Sitting right beside her, she clicked on what she believed was the screenshot of the document.

"When our child was born, she came out fair skinned, smooth hair, etc. Now that she's a bit older she has slowly been turning a much darker brown. Her hair texture has developed into kinkier curls than expected," explained the woman. While she and her husband celebrated their daughter's uniqueness, the family's excessive interest in her evolving features became a cause for unease.

What intensified the situation was her husband's family's consistent involvement in their lives despite never having met the woman's mother. This curiosity from the extended family left the woman conflicted, especially as her husband wholeheartedly embraced their daughter's identity, strengthening their bond through caring for her curly hair.

A Startling Discovery

The woman noticed her daughter's skin tone darkening about a year ago. At that time, her husband's family had started cracking jokes about "the milkman" and teasing her about her spending too much time in the sun during pregnancy.

She didn't pay much attention to it, considering both Serbians and Brazilians, like her husband's family, were not exactly known for their politically correct humor. Although the jokes were frequent and somewhat passive-aggressive, she dismissed them. Eventually, the jibes ceased, and she didn't think much of it.

A few days before sharing her Reddit account, while they were sorting out a fencing issue, the woman was scrolling through her husband's phone photo gallery in search of a specific document picture. Sitting right beside her, she clicked on what she believed was the screenshot of the document. To her surprise, it was a screenshot of a paternity test result, confirming her husband was their daughter's father.

Confused, she confronted her husband, asking him about the test. He seemed incredibly uncomfortable, and this led to an awkward conversation. He confessed that about a year ago, his family had started questioning their daughter's appearance, stating that "none of her family members look that dark." This accusation led them to demand a paternity test, insinuating that she might have cheated on him. The woman was left stunned by this revelation.

The Confrontation

Every time OP's husband visited his family, whether for coffee, cigars, or dinner, the topic of their daughter's paternity became the focal point of discussion. Reflecting on that period, the woman vividly remembered how he would return home unusually irritable and stressed during this time. He had attributed his demeanor to work-related stress and family issues, concealing the actual cause.

Feeling a surge of anger, she confronted him for even considering the idea and found it not only disrespectful to her but also to their daughter. He defended himself, asserting that he had never seriously entertained the notion. He explained that he had only taken the paternity test to appease his family, hoping it would put an end to their relentless questioning.

He showed her old messages from that period, demonstrating his attempts to defend her and dispel his family's baseless suspicions. Despite his efforts, the woman remained furious, especially about his decision to keep her in the dark. Each moment spent at his family's home, she realized, was tainted by their false impressions of her and their daughter.

He argued that he hadn't told her to spare her discomfort, deeming the situation too trivial to trouble her with. However, she couldn't shake off her annoyance at his unilateral decision-making, frustrated that he had thought he could handle such a significant matter without her input.

OP's Reaction

OP's husband expressed sincere apologies—his guilt evident in his demeanor. Despite his remorse, the woman found herself unable to regain her comfort around his family. Her emotions were in disarray; she felt utterly distressed. At the same time, she grappled with the idea of letting the incident slide, all for the sake of their daughter.

In this turbulent time, a new unsettling feeling gnawed at her. For the first time, she questioned her husband's trust in her, a doubt that hadn't existed before. Despite their previously strong bond and open communication, this incident had shaken her to the core.

Their typically vibrant, intimate life and the openness they shared seemed momentarily overshadowed by this breach of trust. Their first significant disagreement left her profoundly upset, unsure of how to handle the situation.

Adding to her turmoil was her husband's inclination to succumb to his family's requests when under pressure, a behavior that increasingly bothered her. Amidst these conflicting emotions, she felt adrift and indecisive about what steps to take next. She found herself wrestling with her feelings, lacking clarity on how to move forward and repair the rift that had developed in their relationship.

Comments from Readers

What do you think about this story? Do you think OP was right to confront her husband about the secret DNA test, or should she have stayed silent, given that he defended her in front of his family? Click here to read another story about a dark-skinned dad who demanded a DNA test on a pale baby as she didn't look like him and his sons.