Am I Wrong for Calling Mom after My Husband Refused to Listen to Me?

After her spouse repeatedly ignored her concerns, a woman thought it was time for some intervention. Family drama spilled over into her marriage and resulted in shocking revelations.

A 24-year-old female Redditor and her husband had recently moved into their first home. She was four months pregnant then with the couple's first child and had been experiencing "horrible morning sickness."

"It reached a really bad point where I passed out hit my head, and my Dr admitted me to the hospital for a week," the woman explained.

Once she was discharged from the hospital, she arrived home only to find that her spouse had allowed her brother-in-law and his family into two of their three bedrooms. According to the Original Poster (OP), they were evicted, and she had no idea why.

One of the rooms in the house was her office space, which she found had papers everywhere. OP expressed how she reacted to the mess she found in her home, saying:

"The house was a complete wreck. Trash, dirty clothes, used diapers. I started to cry."

Her husband told her it was not "that bad," and she told him he should have the house cleaned before she woke up. She slept four hours after that, and when she awoke, she went to grab a glass of water.

To her dismay, she could not find a clean glass as they were all dirty and strewn across the home. Her spouse and family did not clean the house, and out of frustration, she picked up the dirty dishes and washed them.

The following day, she tried to get work done but struggled to focus. The brother-in-law's kids were constantly crying and banging on the walls while their mother spent hours inside the room, ignoring them.

Once OP's husband returned home, he confronted her about making his sister-in-law feel unwelcome in their home. He said she did not try to help her with the children either while mentioning the house still looked a mess.

They argued, and OP told her spouse that she was too sick to have company in their home and that his family needed to leave. He refused to kick them out, and she broke down in tears. Feeling worn out by the situation, OP called her mother, asking if she could go and stay with her.

OP's mother and her three older brothers decided to come over. Her mother was furious and told her husband that since he refused to let his family go, they, too, could stay with them. The mom quickly took charge of the household and sent OP to bed.

Meanwhile, her brothers started to help clean the house, and while doing so, they vocally expressed how "disgusting" their brother-in-law's family was. They also mentioned that her spouse was "horrible" for putting her through that while she was unwell.

OP said she later received a text message from her mother-in-law, who insulted her for not helping her son clean up the house and for allowing her mom to boss around the brother-in-law. Eventually, the mother-in-law made it to the couple's house, and upon arrival, OP could hear her shouting outside but could not hear her exact words.

Nonetheless, she was shocked to see the state the house was in once she got inside. "My house looked really bad. My BIL lied to her about what happened. My MIL quickly started to help my mom in the bossing mode." OP disclosed.

She later updated fellow Reddit users about the developments since the mothers' intervention. According to OP, her brother-in-law and his family finally moved in with her mother-in-law, who did not know about their eviction. She has since helped them financially.

As for her sister-in-law, it turns out she had been having an affair and told her spouse that they married too soon. She also does not want the responsibility of being a mom, which shocked OP.

As for her and her husband, they have since decided to deal with their home situation, and she asked him for some space. "He seemed very remorseful," said OP. The couple later had a deep discussion about their fallout, and OP's spouse revealed his brother was only supposed to stay for a few nights.

But because they stayed longer than agreed, he became overwhelmed and "was emotionally upset himself," which was why he took out his anger on her. The pair separated, but he still begged her to give him a second chance.

They are now attending marriage counseling and individual counseling. OP's husband asked to be there for her doctor's appointments, and when the home health nurse came in to check on her for the night.

OP said she feels bad about calling her mother when she was too sick and tired to deal with her husband and in-laws instead of cleaning up herself.

Do you think OP should not have called her parent and faced her home issues head-on? Do you think her husband was wrong to bring family members to stay with them? What would you do if you were in her position?

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