Would you appreciate, stay loyal, and honest to a good man if one was in your life?

Dear AmoMama,

I'm in a very sticky situation and my own mother is threatening to ruin my life and destroy my marriage. 

I am 38, and I married my husband 10 years ago. At that time I was working as a waitress in a bar in Reno, and he was (and still is) a truck driver. Most of the guys who came to the bar were there for the strippers but he took a shine to me. At that time I was struggling to make ends meet and raising a baby on my own, so when he asked me to marry him I said yes.

He's a nice man, steady and very serious, and hardworking. He adopted my daughter and he's been a real daddy to her. He gives me everything I want and is always sending me flowers and little presents when he is on the road. 

The thing is, he does a lot of long-distance hauls, which means he earns a lot, but he is away for days at a time and I get lonely.

About two or three years ago I went out for a drink with one of my friends from the old days, and this very attractive man approached me and we ended up spending the night together and it was amazing. 

From then on, whenever I get the urge, I go out and get myself some fun on the side. My husband doesn't know, and I reckon what he doesn't know won't hurt him. Besides, I don't know how faithful he is to me, spending so much time on the road? He probably picks up hookers all the time.

Now my mother found out about my hobby, and she is very angry with me. She is a prude and a bitch and she is threatening to tell him everything. 

She just loves him because he asked her to come live with us and set up a little apartment for her in the backyard? I'm her daughter, and her loyalty should be to me!

She tells me he adores me and would never step out on me, and that a lot of women would give anything for a man like that.

I've had enough of her judgment, I told her I won't do it anymore, but she made me get tested for STD's and it turns out I have gonorrhea. I have started meds, but the doc said I have to tell all my sex partners, and if I don't my mother will out me in the worse possible way!

I'm divided between telling him I had a single drunken one night stand, and hope he will forgive me, or telling him I was raped by a stranger and infected that way. 

I just can't decide which would be easier, especially since my mother might blab the truth if I lie and I risk losing my comfortable life, my pretty house.

How can I convince my mother to play along, if not for me, then for the sake of my husband and my child?

If you need help or advice, reach out to us, and thousands of women just like you who are struggling with the difficulties of life. You are not alone, we are here for you, and we listen; so write to us anonymously using this form.

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