This young woman has a strong message for everyone that tells her that she misses her deceased mother "too much" after she has been gone for 7 years.
Nikki Pennington lost her mother almost a decade ago, but it still affects her on a daily basis. She had a close relationship with her mother, and regularly spoke to her and saw her.
Her entire world fell apart when her mother passed away. Suddenly her phone went quiet, and she couldn't fall into her mother's arms for a hug when she had had a bad day.
But Pennington has people in her life who seem to think that they can tell her how much grief is "too much," when they have no frame of reference of their own for what she is dealing with in the loss of her mother.
But Pennington has a perfect response to these people, and penned a beautiful letter online to put her thoughts into words on the matter.
"I dare say that if I asked you if you have a really close relationship with your mom, to go an entire day without talking to her. Don’t pick up the phone to call her or if you do imagine her never answering again. Don’t talk about her, don’t say her name and others will do the same thing when they are around you as if she has just disappeared. Don’t talk to your kids about grandma. Don’t plan any holidays at her house or invite her to any birthday parties and definitely don’t try and text her when something exciting happens in your day. Don’t rush to her side when you’ve had a bad day or even a day that was filled with horrible news and you just need your mom and her hug, but imagine just not ever getting that hug again," she wrote.
For people who still have their mothers, who can still text their mothers on a daily basis, or pick up the phone and have a long chat, or go out to the beach or a restaurant with their mothers, just the thought of never being able to do so again is probably heartwrenching.
But while most don't even want to imagine what it will be like to lose their mothers, there are still those who will apparently weigh in on other's loss without a shred of sympathy or understanding.
"Then imagine someone coming along that can still pick up the phone to call their mom or go out to lunch with her telling you how you are just ‘too much’ into grief, missing your mom just a little ‘too much’ I mean it’s been seven years you should be use to it by now. Imagine them telling you that you are missing out on so much joy because you are missing your mom ‘too much’."
Pennington added that in spite of her loss, she still feels joy and love in her life. Like everyone else, she is capable of feeling more than just one thing, and doesn't feel as though she is missing out on life by also missing her beloved mother.
"So stop telling me my grief is too much or not enough. Stop telling me how to navigate something you can’t understand. Because I’ve learned that if my grief is too much for you, that’s okay because maybe that’s just what the world needs more of and maybe too much is actually just enough,” she concluded.