I've already planned out my son's whole life, but he doesn't want to follow my lead

Dear AmoMamma,

I don't know how to deal with my rebellious son anymore, or how to make him see reason.

I am widowed and have raised my son alone since he was 5, and I thought I'd done a good job. He's a very handsome boy, very bright, but now he has shown himself to be willful and difficult, just like his father.

My son is supposed to be entering Stanford's School of Law in two weeks. He is enrolled and I've paid for the tuition and for his housing fees for the Fall quarter.

Now he is telling me he is not going! We have been battling this out for the last year, but I thought he'd finally realized that I'm the one who decides - because I'm the one who pays.

He has been blabbering about doing Arts since he was 15, and I told him he could do it as a hobby.

That's quite reasonable I think! He does Law at his father's Alma Mater, then he goes into my father's law firm. He will one day be the fourth generation descendant of the original founder, my great-grandfather.

He has a brilliant future ahead of him so why is he being difficult?

As far as I was concerned, it was settled. How dare he go back on his word now? He says he won't go. He enrolled at Browns behind my back, and he tells me that based on his portfolio some art foundation has awarded him a full scholarship.

He wants to waste his time doodling then come out to be broke and unemployable?

I've told him in no uncertain terms that if he does that he is off the teat. No more money from mom, but he doesn't seem to care. I foot the bills, I call the shots, I said.

He won't listen, he just ignores me, and my own sister has accused me of being controlling and obsessive! She has been encouraging this folly behind my back.

How can I make him see I am right? I only want what is best for him and his future.

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