August 15, 2018

Some people go to a therapist to battle their deepest fears

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Most everyone has a deep dark fear, and some people's fear are so severe they need to consult with medical professionals to help them cope with them. 

The monster under the bed

This man has had a fear that someone is under his bed every single night since he was just a child. In an effort to finally deal with the problem, he made an appointment with a psychiatrist, and shared his concerns. 

"Every time I go to bed I think there’s somebody under it. I’m scared. I think I’m going crazy," he told the psychiatrist. 

Thinking for a moment what he could do to help, he came up with the following response: "Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the psychiatrist. "Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears."

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The man pondered that potential solution, but had one important concern.

"How much do you charge?" he asked the doctor. 

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"Eighty dollars per visit," he replied.

The man realized how much it would end up costing him, and responded by telling the doctor he would think about it and make a decision.

Six months later the man and the psychiatrist met on the street.

"Why didn’t you come to see me about those fears you were having?" he asked.

"Well, Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money! A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new SUV."

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The psychiatrist was utterly perplexed as to how that was possible, and wih plenty of attitude responded: "Is that so!" And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?"

He wasn't prepared for the surprising reply he got.

"He told me to cut the legs off the bed – ain’t nobody under there now!" 

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The obsessive mothers

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with three young mothers and their small children. After a period of time with them, he was prepared to make an observation about them. 

"You all have obsessions," he told them.

To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second mom. "Your obsession is money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

At this point, the third mother got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, "Come on, Dick, let's go."

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