Daily Joke: United Way Office Tries to Persuade a Town's Most Successful Lawyer to Donate
Approaching any individual asking for a donation can be a daunting task. In this joke, the person in charge of contributions learned that lesson the hard and hilarious way.
A local United way office was going through the list of donors from its town. It noticed that the most powerful lawyer in the area was yet to make any contributions to the organization.
The head of contributions and donations tried to get in touch with the lawyer to persuade him to donate for a worthy cause. He called his office up with a ready-made donations pitch.
THE PHONE CALL
The lawyer's office secretary put the United way officer on hold for a while before redirecting his call to the lawyer's office. The lawyer picked up, and the officer introduced himself.
After exchanging pleasantries, the officer went straight to his pitch. "Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?" he said.
THE LAWYER'S COMEBACK
The lawyer took some time before he answered the question and said, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?"
The officer was embarrassed and mumbled, "Umm... No." The lawyer immediately followed and said, "or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?"
THE EMBARRASSED UNITED OFFICER
The officer was at the end of his wits at this point and couldn't string words together. He attempted to make an apology but was interrupted by the lawyer again.
Or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rose in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!" The officer was humiliated and said, "I had no idea..."
NOT DONATING TO CHARITY
The lawyer was on a roll, and before the officer could say anything else in his defense, he said, "Your research is flawed in more than one way."
Before he hung up, the lawyer said, "So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you?"
Here's another joke about a ninety-year-old man who went to the doctor for a checkup.