January 28, 2020
A woman with three kids who was raising them by herself got overwhelmed with everything and admitted to her sister that she regretted having kids, sparking a wild debate on Reddit.
According to the woman, she had three children, aged 4 years, 2 years, and 8 months respectively. However, their father left her when she was pregnant for the third child.
This meant that the woman did everything all by herself, including working long shifts and long hours to be able to cater to them. The children's father is also unemployed, and so offers her no support with the children.
A family of four. | Source: Pexels
The woman narrated that she found herself emotionally drained and tired due to the workload she was bearing, although she loved her children.
Her sister, who was thinking about having kids, then approached the woman, asking for her opinion. In her reply, the woman said:
"Having children is great if you have the patience. I was pressured into having my three children, and I regret it every day. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love my children, but you have to be a certain type of person."
Father and child. | Source: Pexels
The woman added that she was never motherly, but only had children because it seemed like the right thing to do. She also reiterated that she loved her children and that they were well cared for.
After the woman's sister heard her words, she looked at her as though the woman kicked puppy, prompting the woman to believe she was wrong for thinking the way she did.
This prompted the man to tell her that she would regret not having kids, and would end up wanting a baby later.
Girls playing with their dolls outdoors. | Source: Shutterstock.
Reddit users who read the woman's story offered their opinions on the issue. One person said that the woman wasn’t wrong with what she said. The person added that people often pretend like children are a true blessing.
The respondent further said that people forgetting that children are also time-consuming, expensive, physically, and emotionally draining, adding that the woman was right to feel the way she did as she was only human. Another person said:
"People need to stop pretending that having kids is always happy shiny Brady bunch stuff."
Sad little girl is looking while her parents are arguing in the background. | Photo: Getty Images
The person added that the woman saying that she regretted having children should not result in her being abused.
Another Reddit user, this time a man, also shared a similar story, asking if he was wrong for telling his wife that she would regret not having kids.
According to the man, he and his wife have been married for a year, and it's been the best thing that would ever happen to him. They, however, got into their first fight a week ago.
Young couple arranges guardianship of little girl. | Photo: Shutterstock
The fight was a result of his wife's insistence on not wanting to have kids. He explained that she said this even before they got married, but that lately, he noticed that she was exhibiting her maternal nature.
He told her that she had a maternal side, and should consider having kids rather than perform a permanent sterilization procedure. His wife, however, didn’t agree and insisted that she didn’t want kids.
This prompted the man to tell her that she would regret not having kids, and would end up wanting a baby later. His wife didn’t take kindly to his words and has remained distant ever since.
A young couple fighting. | Source: Shutterstock.
Almost all the Reddit users who read the story agreed that the man was at fault. Many of them told the man that he was wrong with what he said because his wife clearly stated beforehand that she didn’t want kids, and he should respect her choice.
They explained that since it was her decision not to have kids, the man didn’t have the right to tell her that she would regret it.