Daily Joke: Signs That You Are an 'Advanced Mom'
Today's joke is dedicated to all the mothers who feel that they've turned into advanced moms. Share this joke with your mother, grandmother, and friends, and see how many of these "spot-on" signs you can relate to.
Many people dread turning into their mothers while some aspire to be the exact copy of their moms. Nonetheless, times have clearly changed, and our parents have slowly embraced the advanced and modern ways of life, especially our mothers.
Perhaps, advanced mommyhood begins when you start hating rock concerts because they give you a pounding headache. If you've ever found yourself volunteering to cut up other people's food or concluding a conversation with, "Because I'm the mother, that's why!" then you'll know what we're talking about.
If you struggle in ensuring the sprinkles on your child's cupcakes are equal, or you only have time to shave one leg, you have entered the realms of advanced mom-hood.
There can be times when the bathroom is your hiding place, or you end up catching your kid's vomit. Sometimes when you're at a party and somebody else's child throws up, you just continue to eat your food.
You might have even perfected placing a large number of pancakes and eggs neatly on a plate or obeyed your kids when they tell you to read "Once Upon A Potty" at the top of your voice at the Grand Central Terminal.
Some other signs of advanced motherhood include hoping ketchup counts as a veggie because it's the only thing your kid loves to eat. There may also be times when you feel the urge to cut your husband's sandwiches into odd-looking shapes.
You may even find yourself dreading the thought of your son's first girlfriend, and you detest the idea of him bringing home his wife. Advanced mothers are also likely to take membership at the aquarium because their children are fond of sharks.
Advanced moms become obsessive when their kids don't want to let go of them during the initial school days. However, they obsess even more when their children forget to look back at them the second time. They are also so attached to their kids' clothes that they may never want to give them away.
If you've stopped critiquing the way your mother brought you up or heard her voice coming out of your mouth whenever you utter the words, "NOT in your good clothes," you fall in the category of advanced mom-hood. You might also have become insomniac over time and may even use your saliva to wipe your kid's face.
As an advanced mother, you might have read somewhere that an average five-year-old can ask 437 questions in one day and take pride in your child who identifies as "above average."
You might even hire a nanny because you want to spend time with your husband and then end up staying at home to look after your children.
Finally, advanced moms catch themselves saying these words at least once every day: "I'm not cut out for this job." Regardless, they will never give up who they are or what they do for anything in the world.