Daily Joke: Easy Guide to Catch an Elephant with Home Stuff

Today's jokes are about elephants, with the first one centered around how to catch elephants using household items and the second one about a billionaire who buys an elephant.

Elephants are adorable creatures, but sometimes, they can be bothersome. Sometimes, you might feel the need to catch an elephant for no particular reason. This is why we have compiled an easy-to-follow guide that will help you catch these giant animals using household stuff.

For this purpose, you will require some paint, a piece of cardboard, a stick, a large glass jar with a lid, a pair of tweezers, and a pair of binoculars. Once you've assembled all the necessary items, look for a place where elephants are found in abundance, like a watering hole.

Then create a sign that reads "For Ellefants" using paint, cardboard, and stick. Elephants are extremely particular about grammatical errors. Whenever the first elephant comes across this sign, he will trumpet loudly and gather all the other elephants to come and look at this absurd sign.

When the elephants gather around to look at the sign, they will shake their trunks in sheer disbelief, and that's when you can aim for the catch. After that, grab your binoculars and have a good look at the elephants. However, make sure your binoculars are turned the other way around so that the elephants appear small.

Once everything else is in order, take the tweezers to pick up the small elephants and place them in the jar. When you have caught enough elephants, put the lid on the jar, but make sure the lid has holes in it if you want the elephants to stay alive. Pretty easy, right?

A BILLIONAIRE BUYS AN ELEPHANT

Two billionaire friends met after a long time and started talking. After some small talk, one friend asked the other, "So, how's your home life?"

The other friend happily replied, "It couldn't be better! I bought an elephant!"

The other man looked at his friend in complete shock. "An elephant? Have you gone mad?"

The man smiled at his billionaire friend and replied, "Oh, man. Let me tell you. It's the best purchase in my life! He's grazing on the lawn, making it nice and even. Kids love him! Always riding his back and sliding down his trunk, he keeps them outside instead of in front of the screen all day. "

He continued singing the elephant's praise. "My wife loves him too! He's super strong, helps her with moving things around when I'm not home. And let me tell you, the best thing is - it's kind and smart - the best pet I've ever had!"

The other billionaire listened attentively to his friend and remarked, "Yeah, that sounds....kind of amazing actually! How much did you pay for him?"

The man quickly replied, "A million bucks! Worth every penny, it's a steal at this price."

By this time, the other billionaire friend was starting to see the perks of having an elephant and said, "Sell him to me for two million?"

The friend did not like the offer and added, "No, what are you saying? Sell him? He's like family!"

There was no way the billionaire was giving up, so he raised the selling price to three million. His friend was still not satisfied with the offer and said, "I don't know, man.....you really can't put a price on this kind of friendship and usefulness!"

The billionaire then raised the price to five million, and his friend finally accepted the offer. "Well, okay, man. I'll sell him to you, but only because we're friends."

After a few weeks, the two billionaire friends met again. The man who had bought the elephant was burning with rage, and the moment he saw his friend, he shouted angrily:

"What THE HELL did you sell to me? Not only does he NOT graze the lawn, he completely destroyed all my greenery and trees! There's elephant dung EVERYWHERE; it smells even inside the house! And what was that about kids? They are TERRIFIED of the thing."

The billionaire friend paused for a moment and added, "It's aggressive and massive and scary! I cannot sleep because he trumpets ALL THE TIME. My wife has been having nightmares, and now I won't hear the end of her bickering until I die! IT'S AWFUL, worst purchase in my life!"

The other billionaire looked calmly at his friend and said, "Well, man, I don't know what to say. With this attitude, you'll never sell an elephant!"

Enjoyed these elephant jokes? Check out another joke about a lion who woke up feeling boisterous and mean.

Sources: Reddit, Upjoke