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October 01, 2021

'It Was Absurd': Daughter Refused to Give Her Inheritance to Brother Despite Parents' Request

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Parents request their youngest daughter to give her inheritance to fund her older brother’s college tuition. She turned down their request saying it was absurd and it wasn’t her fault he wasted his part of the inheritance. However, her parents didn’t take her refusal lightly.

If you’re worried about splitting your inheritance with your siblings and fear the outcome of saying no to sharing your part with them, you’re not alone. In a recent post, Redditor Cool_Pea2021 shared her story of the typical inheritance dispute in the family. To her dismay, her parents seemed to be more upset than her older siblings regarding the issue.

As experts put it, unequal inheritance can work, but it can also break relationships. When planning to divide the inheritance unequally, it’s always wise to explain the reason to the heirs to avoid potential conflict. The Redditor wasn’t her parents’ favorite kid, and she knew that she'd face obstacles because of that. 

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YOUNGEST DAUGHTER OF BIASED PARENTS REFUSED TO HELP HER BROTHER 

The teen worked several part-time gigs ever since she turned 13 because her parents treated her differently. She never got any allowances and birthday presents like her older siblings. However, her parents didn’t hesitate to ask her to share her inheritance with her overly spoiled brother. But she refused, saying:

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“I told them it was absurd, and it wasn’t my fault that he wasted his part of the inheritance. Their answer was, “He’s your brother, and he needs help! He’ll help you pay for your studies once he graduates.”

Redditor Cool_Pea2021 didn’t like the idea of postponing her college for 4-5 years and stood her ground with her decision. Eventually, her parents deemed her ungrateful and expletively criticized her for not thinking about family.

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STAGING A STREET FIGHT OVER PROPERTY 

As comedian Matt Wohlfarth emphasized, where there’s a will, a family is fighting over it. However, the battle sometimes ends in an ugly spat between the concerned parties. A befitting example of this is how brothers Jonathan and Laurence Singer engaged in a street brawl over their inheritance, Daily Mail reported:

“The huge family feud over their late mother’s $3 million Melbourne estate came to light when two out of three brothers traded blows outside their mother’s house. The heated argument turned violent when Jonathan accused Laurence of living in their mother’s house without paying rent.”

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Shockingly enough, Laurence had allegedly sold his mother’s valuables without informing the family. Children becoming embroiled in an ugly inheritance dispute isn’t new, and every time, there’s a new story about people trying to con their siblings out of their inheritance.

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ACCUSED OF BEING SELFISH FOR NOT SHARING THE HERITAGE 

As experts put it, being transparent with the inheritance may prevent defrauding in the long run. In some cases, the aftermath of an uninformed heritage can lead to dirty quarrels in the family. For instance, Redditor CleanIndication3350 was accused of being selfish for not giving a share of his inheritance to his late brother’s girlfriend.

“Before he died, he disinherited his three children from his will. Yesterday my brother’s girlfriend (the young one) contacted me asking if I could help support her and her newborn son with some of the inheritance. I thought about it for a few minutes but ended up telling her no,” he explained

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People advised the Original Poster (OP) with a broad spectrum of ideas. While most respondents sided with him, a few claimed there was nothing wrong in sharing the money with his brother’s three children from a previous relationship. However, some people are never informed about why the inheritance hasn’t been shared with another member.

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FAMILY DOESN'T EVOLVE FROM SOMEONE WHO SHARES THE DNA

For instance, Redditor judgeme2313 knew she inherited a $6 million worth estate from her late grandparents, but she didn’t know why her half-sister, Lucy, wasn’t included in the will. OP thought that family doesn’t evolve from someone who shared the DNA and refused to share her inheritance with her half-sister when her mother requested her. She explained:

“I know we’re related by blood, but I don’t exactly feel the type of connection to her that would merit giving her such a large sum of money, or any money at all for that matter. So, I explained that to my mother, and she wasn’t exactly happy with my answer. She believes I’m being extremely selfish.” 

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Sometimes, circumstances around a family member’s death can leave a family squabbling over property which can be avoided with a few strategies, claims Patrick O’Brien, Next Avenue Contributor. Communicating about inheritance changes helps children to process their intentions without creating a rift between siblings. 

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WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE PERSON'S NAME ISN'T MENTIONED IN THE WILL?

Splitting an inherited property among siblings can be challenging when a person’s name isn’t mentioned in the will. Redditor thekilkennywarrior had no clue about his aunt and the inheritance she left for him until her passing. However, when OP’s brother demanded an equal split from the heritage, things turned awry though his name wasn't mentioned in the will. 

“He insists that I sell the house as well and split the money from its sale. Only then would it be fair, according to him. I refused. I told him no. The house and money are legally mine. It was my name written on my aunt’s will. My name only,” OP said.

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The Redditor claimed he refused to sell the house because he assumed his spendthrift brother would party hard with the money split from the sale of the house. Despite the negative and judgmental comments, OP was hellbent not to sell the house and split the share with his brother. 

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The stories of families torn apart by disputes over inheritances are nothing short of horror. Siblings fighting over parents’ will, children fighting with stepparent over bank accounts… it’s ugly.

However, most families don’t have bitter disputes over inherited property or money, and very few end up quarreling in court. Nevertheless, the death in the family doesn’t always bring out the best in people, especially when it’s a lump sum surprise negotiated in a will.

Sometimes, siblings can get disappointed if their names aren’t mentioned in the will. But that doesn’t mean they’re greedy. They’re probably hurt, confused, and even frustrated by the fact that they didn’t get their rightful share. 

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As Patrick O’Brien suggests, being fair with the split and ensuring each child receives things of monetary and not just sentimental value might avoid conflict. Also, siblings are less likely to blame each other when you provide detailed instructions in the will. 

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Patrick emphasizes writing a letter to kids to be read when the will is being shared to help them realize that you tried to be fair with the inheritance. Practical tactics like reminding them that family outweighs possessions can help harmonize their relationship instead of igniting a sibling rivalry over an inheritance.

 What is your opinion about this? Do you think it’s okay to blindly give away your inheritance despite knowing the receiver would return empty-handed for more money? Your comments are much appreciated! Thanks for reading!

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