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Kevin Spacey | Kevin Spacey [inset] | Kevin Spacey and Helen Hunt | Source: Getty Images
Kevin Spacey | Kevin Spacey [inset] | Kevin Spacey and Helen Hunt | Source: Getty Images

'Pay It Forward's Kevin Spacey Didn't Publicly Come Out as Gay until He Was 58 Because of His Father

Daniella Segell
Oct 24, 2022
01:00 P.M.
  • Kevin Spacey was once told that he was a "born actor" when he was 13.

  • He allegedly dated a few big Hollywood names, like Helen Hunt and Dianne Dreyer.

  • Spacey came out at 58 but later cried and said he regretted doing so.

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Kevin Spacey always knew that he would be an actor. When he was 13 years old, he dreamed of being a big name in Hollywood, and Jack Lemmon told him he was a natural during an acting workshop.

The actor grew up in a household where his parents were a secretary and a technical writer; however, he knew he would not go into an ordinary career as he fell in love with theatre in junior high school.

Kevin Spacey attends the Build Series to discuss his new play 'Clarence Darrow' at Build Studio on May 24, 2017 in New York City | Source: Getty Images

Kevin Spacey attends the Build Series to discuss his new play 'Clarence Darrow' at Build Studio on May 24, 2017 in New York City | Source: Getty Images

When Spacey was in an acting workshop with Jack Lemmon, he performed, and Lemmon approached him after it to tell him that he was a great actor and that his performance was "a touch of terrific."

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Lemmon was not the only one who thought that Spacey was an excellent actor. Spacey's costar, Robin Wright, said that he was a great actor who she enjoyed working with. Talking about his skill, she said:

"I knew the incredible craftsman that he is."

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While his craftsmanship has been recognized throughout his career, Spacey's personal life has also been heavily scrutinized. His relationships with fellow Hollywood stars have been rumored to be romantic many times.

Spacey's Alleged Hollywood Relationships

While Spacey has always been private about his personal life, his love life has been under the microscope many times. One of these rumored relationships was between Spacey and his "Pay It Forward" co-star, Helen Hunt.

Helen Hunt and Kevin Spacey act in a scene in the Warner Bros. Pictures and Bel-Air Entertainment's drama, "Pay It Forward." | Source: Getty Images

Helen Hunt and Kevin Spacey act in a scene in the Warner Bros. Pictures and Bel-Air Entertainment's drama, "Pay It Forward." | Source: Getty Images

However, his most notorious relationship was with Dianne Dreyer, whom he was with for eight years, from 1992 to 2000. He declared his love for her in an Oscars acceptance speech and said he would like to have children.

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His relationships with women came at a time in his life when many were speculating that Spacey was homosexual. An article posted in "Esquire" claimed that he was gay, but Spacey denied the rumors.

Dianne Dreyer and Kevin Spacey attend the 57th Annual Golden Globe Awards on January 23, 2000 at Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, California | Source: Getty Images

Dianne Dreyer and Kevin Spacey attend the 57th Annual Golden Globe Awards on January 23, 2000 at Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, California | Source: Getty Images

He mentioned that the rumors about him being gay made him more attractive to women, which he enjoyed, but he repeatedly confirmed that he was not homosexual. In fact, when The Sunday Times asked if he was gay, he said:

"The answer to that is no. But why should it matter?"

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Spacey was rumored to have been seen many times with men but managed to shut down the rumors each time it came out that he was gay. His brother confirmed that his private life was vastly different from the one he showed the public.

In 2017, Spacey mocked the rumors that he was homosexual by wearing a black and gold dress and singing about coming out. However, he backtracked by jokingly saying, "Wait, no, wait." It was not until later that he came out.

Spacey Came Out at 58

In October 2017, when Spacey was 58 years old, he took to Instagram to address claims by Anthony Rapp that Spacey had behaved inappropriately toward him many years ago. Spacey said he did not remember the incident but was apologetic nonetheless.

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He then said that Rapp's claims had encouraged him to examine other areas of his life and that he knew there were rumors about him because of how closely he guarded his privacy. It was then that he came out as a gay man.

Spacey said those close to him knew the truth about his love life throughout the years. He confessed:

"I have loved and had romantic encounters with men throughout my life, and I now choose to live as a gay man."

Anthony Rapp attends Rapp Reads Rapp at the Symphony Space on December 12, 2011 in New York City | Source: Getty Images

Anthony Rapp attends Rapp Reads Rapp at the Symphony Space on December 12, 2011 in New York City | Source: Getty Images

Spacey came out largely because of the allegations against him by Rapp, which were posted in a "BuzzFeed" article. Rapp claimed that Spacey sexually assaulted him at a party when Rapp was 14 and Spacey was 26.

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Spacey denied the rumors at first but later accepted they might be true, and he couldn't remember the incident. Later, in court for the allegations against him by Rapp, Spacey said he regretted how he came out.

He mentioned that he began getting negative feedback within minutes of revealing that he was homosexual. While fans and friends were not upset that he was gay, they were upset at the timing of his coming out.

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Spacey admitted that soon after coming out, he was told that he was trying to distract from his past behavior by giving people something else to talk about. He cried and said it was never his intention to do that.

While he worked with a PR team to formulate the statement, he took full responsibility for his words and said that he had put them up and had made a mistake, for which he apologized.

Talking about what made him wait so long before coming out, Spacey alluded to the fact that his father would not have been able to accept his son was a homosexual or had romantic desires for other men.

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Spacey referred to his father as a "neo-nazi" and said that his father would yell at him for showing an interest in the theatre when he was younger because he thought it might mean that his son was gay.

Spacey's brother, a Rod Stewart impersonator, said that he and his brother no longer have a relationship but were close growing up. Randy Fowler, Spacey's brother, said they were both interested in performing.

Fowler mentioned that the brothers were close when they were younger because they were both interested in the arts. Fowler was interested in music, and Spacey was interested. Fowler said the brothers used to support each other at each other's performances.

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Although Spacey and Fowler don't have much in common anymore, Fowler also admitted that he felt stifled by their father. Fowler admitted:

"I grew up in a living hell. There was so much darkness in our home it was beyond belief. It was absolutely miserable."

Spacey also has a sister, Julie Ann Fowler, with whom he is close. It is said that he is fond of his sister and her two children, but because the actor is notoriously private, not much else is known about their relationship.

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