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For illustrations purposes only | Source: Shutterstock
For illustrations purposes only | Source: Shutterstock

I Didn't Invite My Mom to My Wedding after Finding Out Why She Excluded Me from Her Own

Gaone Pule
Mar 04, 2024
12:45 P.M.

In the realm of Reddit, personal dilemmas and family feuds are rife, particularly when wedding preparations are underway. Delve into three compelling accounts from individuals who, for reasons deeply personal, chose not to invite their mothers to their weddings.

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Bride and groom kissing in front of guests | Source: Pexels

Bride and groom kissing in front of guests | Source: Pexels

The first narrative on Reddit involves a shattered dream. The Original Poster (OP) recently revealed that when she was 13, she learned her mother and her mom's boyfriend would be tying the knot. She was elated for the couple and congratulated them.

OP recalled a promise made in childhood by her mother, ensuring her a special place in her future wedding. She divulged:

"Ever since I was a little girl my mom has always told me I would be in her wedding and I would be the flower girl. That made me very happy."

However, as the wedding approached, 14-year-old OP learned she and her disabled brother would not attend their mother's wedding. Yet, their aunt and uncle, including their stepfather's kids were on the guest list.

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A mother comforting her crying daughter | Source: Pexels

A mother comforting her crying daughter | Source: Pexels

Naturally, OP was devastated and cried about it. She asked her mother why she could not be at her wedding. "'Because we were 'too young, and we needed a babysitter,'" her mother explained. After the wedding, OP chose not to speak to her mother for nearly two weeks. This early wound led to a decision she made later on that mirrored the past.

Now, OP is almost 20 years old and is about to walk down the aisle. She did not invite her mother to her own wedding, and her parent found out about the snub before the ceremony, leading the two to engage in a "big argument" that severed their communication.

A mother and her daughter arguing during breakfast | Source: Pexels

A mother and her daughter arguing during breakfast | Source: Pexels

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In her Reddit post, OP questioned fellow Redditors whether she was wrong to retaliate. One user commented, saying it was her wedding while assuming there might be more than she was letting on, hence she does not want her mom there.

OP replied to the user's comment, stating she truly would have liked to have her mother at her wedding, but because she hurt her feelings as a child and destroyed her dream, she could not allow her to come to hers.

A young woman posing for a studio portrait | Source: Pexels

A young woman posing for a studio portrait | Source: Pexels

In April 2023, a 27-year-old female Reddit user shared her journey toward a non-traditional wedding. Her story is one of estrangement as she disclosed: "I have not lived with my mom since I was 16. We never had a good relationship and she was not a very good mother to me."

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The absence of her mother's presence in her life was filled by her partner's mother. Despite attempts to reconnect, OP faced continued criticism from her biological mother, leading to her decision not to invite her to the wedding.

She remained steadfast when challenged by her family, stating, "My stepdad called me saying my mom was really upset... I told him that I'm not changing my decision and if they show up they will not be allowed in."

A young woman touching her head while talking on the phone | Source: Pexels

A young woman touching her head while talking on the phone | Source: Pexels

In January 2023, one other Reddit user, a 27-year-old male, recounted his fractured family ties. "My parents divorced when I was 2. My mom remarried to her current husband... I've never gotten along with my mom or stepdad," OP revealed.

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He described a childhood tarnished by his mother's affair and subsequent marriage, leading to a distant relationship with his half and step-siblings. His wedding plans reflected these deep-seated tensions.

An angry young man sitting at a table | Source: Pexels

An angry young man sitting at a table | Source: Pexels

"I decided I didn't want her whole family at my wedding," OP shared. This decision led to conflict, with his mother withdrawing from the wedding, only to later express a desire to attend. But the OP's resolve remained.

He revealed she called him and was furious about the fact that his stepsister would be a bridesmaid at the wedding. "She started to yell/cry so I just hung up," said OP. His dad advised him to reconsider and show his mother empathy. But he stood his ground, noting that his mother was okay with not going to the wedding for months.

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As for OP's stepmother, she supported him in every decision he made, yet felt sorry for the biological mother, hence suggesting he should include her in the wedding regardless of their circumstances.

Bride and groom walking together while looking at each other | Source: Pexels

Bride and groom walking together while looking at each other | Source: Pexels

Overall, the OPs have been torn between forgiveness and remembrance, each choosing a path that best suits their emotional landscape.

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Read more about three unbelievable stories about what mother-in-laws dared to do to their daughter-in-laws' wedding dresses.

The Wedding Dress Betrayal

A woman shared her astonishment and dismay on Reddit's platform, recounting an incident that struck at the heart of her wedding preparations. The center of the controversy? A $3,000 wedding gown, a symbol of her dreams for the perfect wedding day, which became the subject of an unexpected betrayal.

The drama began innocently enough, with her fiancé's mother expressing an unusual interest in trying on the wedding dress. Despite the bride-to-be's refusal, the mother-in-law persisted, even offering cash as a bizarre form of rental fee. The situation escalated when the woman returned home to find her fiancé acting suspiciously, blocking her path to their bedroom. Her instincts led her to investigate, only to discover her future mother-in-law donned in her pristine wedding gown.

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Reacting to the audacity of the act, the original poster (OP) captured the moment with a photograph, leveraging it as evidence to demand restitution for a new dress. Her fiancé's reaction, however, was far from supportive. He accused her of overreacting, igniting a fiery argument that saw the mother-in-law in tears and the fiancé in defense of his mother's "harmless" desire.

Feeling violated and disgusted, the bride-to-be stood her ground, asserting that the wedding dress was sacred, meant only for the bride. This stance led to a widening rift between her and her fiancé, further exacerbated when her own family suggested she might be overreacting, risking her relationship with her fiancé and his mother over a dress.

The situation took a turn towards the absurd when her fiancé proposed a "solution" that included him paying for the dress, coupled with a series of demands: an apology to his mother, the deletion of the incriminating photo, and a temporary social media hiatus. These conditions left the woman in a quandary, unwilling to accept financial compensation from her fiancé and adamant that the responsibility lay with his mother.

This wedding dress saga resonated deeply with Reddit's community. Readers rallied around the bride-to-be, offering support and affirming the validity of her feelings of betrayal and shock.

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Wedding Wars: When a Mother-in-Law’s Vision Clashes with the Bride’s Dream Dress

In another startling revelation, a woman, 33, turned to Reddit's "AITA" forum in September 2022, sharing her story and seeking advice. She revealed that she and her fiancé, 28, were preparing for their December wedding. However, she faced mounting challenges primarily due to her future MIL's involvement in the wedding preparations.

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A happy couple playing with their dog | Source: Shutterstock

A happy couple playing with their dog | Source: Shutterstock

Despite her MIL being described as generally nice but somewhat intrusive, tensions were brewing, and the wedding planning was going downhill. OP noted that her future MIL made things difficult by being unwilling to agree on most things.

The situation escalated to the point where her fiancé got involved. He sided with his parent by insisting that, as his mother's only son, OP should respect and appreciate the "vision" she had for the wedding and how she wanted it to unfold.

A woman trying on a wedding dress surrounded by her friends | Source: Shutterstock

A woman trying on a wedding dress surrounded by her friends | Source: Shutterstock

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The turning point came when the future MIL insisted on accompanying OP to shop for her wedding dress, joining her mother and friends. During this shopping excursion, the soon-to-be bride found a gown that resonated with her.

However, her fiancé's mother had a different vision in mind. The older woman chose a dress, claiming it was the one she had always envisioned her son's bride wearing. But her words left OP's friends and family feeling uneasy.

Different wedding dresses on display | Source: Pexels

Different wedding dresses on display | Source: Pexels

Despite feeling uncomfortable with the older woman's choice, OP politely expressed her gratitude for her input but explained that she already envisioned a different dress for herself. Her response did not sit well with the older woman, who shared her disappointment with her son.

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When the bride-to-be returned home, her fiancé confronted her, stating that she'd made his mother feel rejected and excluded from the dress selection process. An argument ensued, with the fiancé insisting that OP reconsider wearing his mother's chosen gown, alleging that the two weren't that different.

A man talking to an older woman while a younger woman sits to the side looking away | Source: Shutterstock

A man talking to an older woman while a younger woman sits to the side looking away | Source: Shutterstock

OP strongly disagreed, noting the substantial disparities between the two gowns. The argument eventually subsided, but tensions remained high. Things worsened when the bride-to-be returned home one day to discover that her chosen wedding dress had been replaced with the one favored by her future MIL.

Her fiancé confessed to the switch being made but explained his belief that OP should give the new one a chance. Overwhelmed with anger, she screamed at him and left to stay with a friend. Determined to resolve things, her fiancé argued that her response was an overreaction, emphasizing that it was his wedding too, and urged her to give the new dress a chance.

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Two women arguing | Source: Shutterstock

Two women arguing | Source: Shutterstock

He insisted on his mother having good intentions and her desire to see OP in a gown of her choosing. OP's mother was livid and wished to confront her future son-in-law and his mother; however, her husband advised against it, fearing it would damage whatever relationship they had with their future in-laws.

A young couple having an argument at home | Source: Getty Images

A young couple having an argument at home | Source: Getty Images

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He suggested OP goes along with the groom's mother's wishes to keep the peace. Frustrated and seeking advice, the Redditor asked the online community if her reaction was justified. Luckily, many users recognized the future MIL as a classic control freak and also noted that the fiancé wasn't any better, having failed to defend his future wife.

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