No one ever wants to be pulled over for speeding. While most people try to avoid getting pulled over at all costs, many have to admit to having received a speeding ticket or two in their life.
Despite speeding is a serious matter, it’s always a great subject matter for a good joke now and then. This new one from the Uplifting Today site certainly made many people laugh out loud.
The joke goes like this: An elderly lady was clocked at 95 mph in a 70 mph zone. The Highway Patrol pulled her over and approached the driver’s door. “Is there a problem, officer?” said the old lady.
The policeman said, “Ma’am, you were speeding. Can I see your license, please?” She replied, “I’d give it to you, but I don’t have one.” The officer got concerned at this point and asked again “You don’t have one?”
The lovely granny said "Sorry office, but it got revoked two years ago for drunk driving." He furrowed his brow and asked, "Well, in that case, can I see the registration for the car?" She replied, “I’m sorry, I can’t do that.”
The policeman said, “Why not?” He never imagined the answer that the old lady would give to him; she said: “I stole this car.” The officer said, “Stole it?” And she simply replied, "I stole the car and killed the driver, he's in the trunk."
The officer immediately reacted, "Ma'am, DON'T MOVE, I'm calling for backup." He returned to his car and began to mutter furiously into his walkie-talkie.
Within minutes, five police cars showed up, surrounding the car. A senior officer slowly approached the car, clasping his half-drawn gun. The senior officer said, “Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle, please!”
The woman asked softly, “Is there a problem, Sir?” The officer is cautious now, "Ma'am, can I please see your license?", he asked sternly. She replies, "Of course, officer," and she smiled demurely, pulling her license from her purse.
He squints warily at the license, "This looks legitimate. Ma'am, one of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.” He then asked, “Can I see the registration for this car?" She pulled the registration out of the glove box and handed it to him.
“Yes, here are the registration papers.” Now, the officer is quite stunned. “One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.” He suddenly bursts out, "Ma'am, stand back!" He bangs open the trunk of the car and flinches, but it was completely empty.
“Ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.” The older woman replied with a smile in her face “I bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.”
March 01, 2019