Red Skelton's recipe for the perfect marriage

Ksenia Novikova
Jul 25, 2018
03:28 P.M.
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Marriage can be tough for people. However, comedian Red Skelton, made it seem easy with his humor about everyday situations.


Bored Daddy listed some of his hilarious rules for a happy marriage.

Red Skelton, a famous comedian and an entertainer known for his clean humor, had a set of rules for a perfect marriage among other things.

His rules on an ideal marriage are hilarious, and one can always get a few laughs out of everyone.

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Skelton talks about doing things that make both the husband and wife happy. One of the things is going out to a fine restaurant twice a week to have delicious food, a drink or two and to bond.


He says to do that, his wife goes on Tuesdays, and he goes on Fridays.

Next, he talks about their sleeping arrangements. They slept in different beds; his bed was in Texas and hers in California.

Source: Freepik


He says that he takes her everywhere and even after doing so, she always ends up reaching back home.

Something he mentions is asking her about where his wife wished to go for their anniversary to which she replied that she wants to go somewhere that she's never been in a long time.

Skelton’s response to that, as expected, is witty. He thinks she should go to the kitchen.

While for most couples holding hands is just a habit, for Skelton it is a method to stop his wife from shopping.

When his wife mentioned that there are too many electronic gadgets in the kitchen, things such as toaster and blender, and there is no place at all to sit. He bought her an electric chair.


His wife once told him that there water in the carburetor and the car was not working well. When he asked her where the car was, she said it was in the lake.

He revealed that his wife looked beautiful for two days after she had applied the mud pack, after which the mud pack fell off.


One morning his wife ran to catch up to the garbage truck, shouting, “Am I too late for the garbage?” The driver of the truck said, “No, jump in!”

Skelton also realized the most important reason for divorces – marriage.

The famous saying 'Women are always right,' is hilariously expressed by Skelton. He says that he did marry Miss. Right, but was not aware that her first name was Always.

He says he hasn't spoken to his wife in 18 months and says that it was because he hates to interrupt her.

Source: Freepik


The cause of their last fight, Skelton said, was his fault. When his wife asked what was on TV, he replied that there was dust.

The audience loved to listen to Red Skelton, and his humor is still appreciated by people all over the world.

Marriage is made out to be hard and scary and that people who get into it are being trapped and setting themselves up for some big trouble.

But humor can make some of the hardest situations, like marriage, seem a little less hard.