I am tired of living a double life. It sucks

Dear Amomama,

I know many will immediately consider me a slut after I tell my story. I really do not care, I really need a piece of advice from someone who wouldn't condemn me for what I sometimes do to my husband. I ask you to read carefully first so that you can understand my position before any advice or criticism.

We have been married for 13 years. I do not cheat on my husband that often. During our marriage, I have only cheated on him with three men. You could be a prude, but according to statistics, more than 60% of married women cheat on their husbands.

For some reason, I have no intimate compatibility with him at all. He is 15 years older than me, and his little buddy "down there" doesn't always work as I would like to. I even thought about leaving him, but we have children. I am sure that what is happening is not affecting their development in any way.

Children do not know what is happening. Well, maybe my older son is realizing something, but he is already 12 years old and should begin to understand everything soon. I do not want you to get me wrong, nor sound harsh, but anonymity allows me to be frank with you, and all I want is an honest answer: What would you do if you were me?

My husband is the breadwinner and he is very kind. He is a very interesting person with whom you are not afraid to grow old. However, I realized that he did not turn me on, even before the wedding. It is not possible to compare him with young guys in this regard.

He is a faithful husband and a good father, but he is not the best lover I have ever had. My husband sees that I am happy. I do this very carefully, so he does not suspect that I cheat on him.

Everything was fine until recently. At the gym I met a great man, somehow we ended up sleeping together... This has happened several times. I understand that he is not my man, but in terms of sex, everything just flows naturally, and the feeling is mutual.

I do not know what to do. For me he would only be a "guy on the side", but he wants me to become his woman. He is even ready to break up with his wife. I certainly do not love him. Besides, what will my husband do at his age, if I leave him?

Maybe there's some kind person able to understand me and give me some useful advice... I really do not want to leave my husband and make my kids think I am a slut, or that I don't want to be in a family with them and their father. I'm just enjoying my sexuality, that's all...

I have lived with my husband for many years and it would be a mistake to end everything like that. I need you to understand me and give me advice. What would you do if you were me?

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