logo

How do I live after I have cheated on him?

Manuela Cardiga
Aug 07, 2018
08:53 P.M.

Dear AmoMama,

Advertisement

I have no excuse for what I did. I was stupid, and I was vain and that is why I cheated. My husband loves me, we've always had great sex. We were a happy couple, and still would be if I wasn't so venal.

Two weeks ago we went to his sister's 50th birthday party in LA. She is a producer and I knew the party would be glamorous so I maxed out the credit card and got myself this vamp dress and designer heels, and when we walked into that party I felt like a movie star.

I don't remember having had so much fun in my life, and I drank a lot more than I usually do. At dinner, my husband was seated at his sister's right hand and I was further down seated between a writer and a young actor.

Source: Pexels

Source: Pexels

Advertisement

I recognized the actor as a guy who was starring in this new cop show, and we started chatting. He was so fascinated by me, and I was so flattered that when he put his hand on my leg under the table I just smiled.

I mean, here I was, a 42-year-old housewife from Portland, and a man who could have gorgeous starlets wanted ME.

After dinner and a lot of surreptitious touching, he spirited me upstairs into one of the bedrooms and we made love. That is a lie. He had sex with me. It was hurried and uncomfortable and not very good at all. All that excitement I'd felt at the dinner table evaporated.

Source: Pexels

Source: Pexels

I came downstairs feeling filthy and stupid and saw my husband looking for me. He introduced me to another one of my sister's friends and he looked so proud of me.

Advertisement

I have never felt so sick, so disgusted with my self. I don't think I'd ever felt true shame and regret until that night.

I can't look my husband in the eyes, and I avoid his touch, I feel so dirty. I don't deserve him, or his trust. He's been asking me what is wrong, and I know he is very worried about me.

Source: Pexels

Source: Pexels

What can I say to him? I'm ok but I'm a filthy slut? I feel that if I come clean and tell him, we can work through this. But I don't want to see that pain and disappointment in his eyes. Please, what should I do?

If you need help or advice, reach out to us, and thousands of women just like you who are struggling with the difficulties of life. You are not alone, we are here for you, and we listen; so write to us anonymously using this form.

Advertisement
info
Please fill in your e-mail so we can share with you our top stories!
By subscribing, you agree to our Privacy Policy
Advertisement
Related posts

I Saw a Birthmark on Baby Niece’s Body and Realized That My Husband’s a Cheater – Story of the Day

October 20, 2023

Сrying Girl in Shabby Clothes Bursts into Wedding and Goes into Labor Right at Groom's Feet – Story of the Day

October 12, 2023

Wife Spots Husband Taking Wedding Ring off When He Leaves Home, Follows Him Once – Story of the Day

August 07, 2023

Man Finds 3 Kids in His Basement, Learns They Secretly Live There Alone for a Year – Story of the Day

October 26, 2023

‘She’s Not My Sister,’ Boy Says of Newborn Sibling, Parents Take DNA Test Confirming It – Story of the Day

September 20, 2023

Landlord Rents House to Man, Soon Learns That 17 Kids Live There Illegally – Story of the Day

October 03, 2023

Granddad Forbids Anyone to Touch His Old Mattress, Girl Finds Stash There after His Death – Story of the Day

October 04, 2023

31 Times People Took Brutal Revenge on Their Cheating Partners

October 04, 2023

Groom Realizes Bride Lives Double Life after Two Dirty Crying Kids Interrupt Their Wedding – Story of the Day

October 26, 2023

Old Man Saves Boy from Bullies, Next Day Sees Boy’s Parents on His Porch – Story of the Day

August 16, 2023

Children Refuse to Support Old Father, Learn He Died Trying to Earn at Least a Penny – Story of the Day

October 18, 2023

Man Constantly Mocks Unemployed Wife for Doing Nothing, Finds a Note after Ambulance Takes Her Away — Story of the Day

July 20, 2023

Bride’s Mom Spots Groom Entering Bathroom with Bridesmaid in the Middle of Wedding – Story of the Day

August 31, 2023

Single Mom of 3 Adopts Twins She Watched in Park, Their Birth Mom Shows up on Their 18th Bday – Story of the Day

August 14, 2023