He cheats on me, but says it's my fault for not doing what he wants

Dear AmoMamma,

I have been married for 12 years and I always thought our sex life was pretty good. Now all that has changed. My husband suddenly started to try some things I was not very comfortable with, and I told him I didn't like it.

Source: Pixabay

Source: Pixabay

The first time this happened he accepted my objection with ill grace but made love to me, like we usually do.

The second time, he brought some handcuffs and bondage literature and said he wanted to restrain me, that it is a form of art.

I suppose I could have allowed it but somehow the idea of being so totally in his power disturbed me.

Source: Pixabay

Source: Pixabay

That night, he just got up, got dressed and went out, leaving me at home alone.

A few hours later he came home smelling of alcohol and cheap perfume. >When he took odd his shirt I saw that he had cuts on his back.

Source: Pixabay

Source: Pixabay

I asked him about it, and he said: "If you won't do what I want, I'll go find someone who will!"

I don't know what to do, I asked him if we could talk about it, but he said this was too 'advanced' for me. 

I don't know how to react. He is suddenly obsessed with these things, and all I want is my husband back to normal. What should I do?

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