I gave my daughter up for adoption 30+ years ago. She has found me on the internet

The following letter has been edited for clarity and coherence.

Dear AmoMama,

I gave my daughter up for adoption 30+ years ago. She has found me on the internet.

My children don't know about each other. And I am shaken and excited and sad and thrilled all at the same time.

The only way to express my moods is to lie to my children and grandchild, who live with me, why I am sad.

I pray and accepted my decision and have convinced myself that if you do the right thing, you will receive what you give.

But what I need your opinion on is, " is not telling my children wrong?". Either way I will be ok. 

___________________________________________________________

Dear Subscriber,

This must be a very confusing and emotional time for you. Having your past come back into your life in the form of the child you gave up for adoption must be very difficult.

You say you are shaken, excited and sad, and you feel the need to conceal your feelings from your family.

You do not explain the circumstances under which you gave your daughter up, and it may be fear of your children's judgment that is keeping you silent.

You will meet your daughter, and if you don't tell your children you will once again be carrying a secret, hiding from the people who love you the most.

Make peace with the past. Embrace your long lost daughter, and trust your other children will understand and support you.

Be strong, be happy, be yourself.

Do you agree with our advice? What do you think this subscriber could do to solve her problem?

If you need help or advice, reach out to us, and thousands of women just like you who are struggling with the difficulties of life. You are not alone, we are here for you, and we listen; so write to us anonymously using this form.

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