July 13, 2019

Daily Joke: Man Was Walking Home When a Thief Jumped Him All of a Sudden

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While burglaries are nothing to laugh at, the things some burglars get up to while in the act of stealing, however, can be hilarious. Enjoy our joke of the day!


A burglar breaking into a home. | Source: Shutterstock.


Charles walked home after work one evening when he suddenly got attacked by a thief. The man pulled Charles into the alley, and they fell to the ground, wrestling each other as Charles bravely fought back against the thief as best he could.

They rolled around on the cold, clammy cement, each trying to get the upper hand over the other, but eventually, the man got the better of Charles and pinned him to the ground.

The mugger carefully searched all Charles’ pockets, but he only found $1. Disappointed but surprised by this, he asked Charles, “Why did you bother to put up such a fight for $1?”

Visibly relieved by the thief’s question, Charles replied, "I thought you were after the five-hundred dollars I've got in my shoe!"


A robber seaching for valuables by flashlight. | Source: Shutterstock.


One night after a family left their home for an evening out, a burglar broke in. Eager to see what valuables he could get his hands on, the man methodically moved through the house searching the visible and not so apparent spots.


As he went into the living room, the robber suddenly heard a voice coming from seemingly nowhere. “Jesus is watching you,” the voice said.

Confused, he decided to clear the house again to make sure he didn’t miss anyone when he checked the first time.

The thief found no-one, and as he went into the kitchen, he heard the voice again as it said, “Jesus is watching you.”

Then the man remembered seeing a parrot and walked up to the cage and asked, “Are you the one who’s been talking to me?”

A parrot ontop of his cage at night. | Source: Shutterstock.


“Yes, I am,” the parrot replied. Stunned, the robber asked. “What is your name?”

Bluntly the parrot answered, “Ismael.”

The man chuckled and said, “What kind of an idiot name their parrot Ismael?” Without hesitation, the parrot replied, “The same idiot that named his Rottweiler Jesus.”

While on the topic of belongings, in a related joke of the day, we compiled funnies relating to the relationships some men have with their cars.