This triple-threat joke of the day will surely relate to many. It involves one couple at the cinema, two rednecks walking down the street, and newlyweds dealing with brand new home life together.
One day, a man was dragged to the cinema by his wife who wanted to watch a romantic comedy.
Half an hour into the film, the man felt a nudge in his elbow. "What an outrage," his wife murmured to him.
"The person sitting in front of us is sleeping!" the woman said, clearly offended.
Meanwhile, her husband was fairly annoyed.
He replied: "You mean, you woke me up to tell me that?"
A man and his wife holding hands and walking together | Photo: Pixabay
Elsewhere, a newlywed couple was just getting into the groove of living together.
The husband came home one day to find his wife in a sea of tears. "What's the matter, honey?" he asked.
"Darling," she sobbed. "The most horrible thing just happened! I cooked my first beef bourguignon just for you."
A house with a bicycle in front of it | Photo: Pixabay
"Then, when I took it out of the oven to season it, the phone rang. By the time I came back, the cat had eaten it up!"
The husband comforted her. "Don't worry sweetheart. You don't have to cry. We'll just get a new cat in the morning."
A cat resting on a wooden frame | Photo: Pixabay
Two rednecks were walking from different ends of a street towards each other. One was carrying a bag.
When they met up, one of them said. "Hey Jimmy, what's that you there in your bag?"
"Just some chickens," Jimmy replied.
"If I guesses how many ya got, can I have one?"
"Shoot, if ya guess just right, I'll give you both of them?"
"Okay! Umm, I think it's five!"
Photo of two bearded workers smiling at camera while posing in production workshop | Photo: Getty Images
One day, a university student went to her professor's office after class. She made sure the hallway was clear, then closed the door.
The student looked at her professor with sweet eyes. In a hushed voice, she told him: "I would do anything to pass this exam, professor."
The student leaned forward and made her voice more seductive as she repeated, "I mean, I would do anything."
The professor looked at her and asked, "You'll do anything?" to which the student immediately responded with confidence, "Anything."
The professor's voice softened to match hers. "Anything?" he again asked. Again, and with a smile, the girl said, "Anything."
Then, the professor's voice was just a whisper as he asked, "Would you... study?"