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Daily Joke: Homeless Man's Life Changes in Just One Week

Laura Beatham
Jul 08, 2021
01:30 A.M.
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Today's jokes are about three different broke people, including one person whose life was affected by COVID-19, a man who was invited to dinner, and a man who visited a fortune-teller.

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A man was talking to a homeless man about how he ended up being homeless. He told him, "Up until last week, I had it all. I had access to food every day, clean clothes that were pressed for me each day..."

Photo: AmoMama

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"I had a roof over my head, I had HDTV and internet, and I went to the gym, the library, and the pool. I was doing my MBA online. I had no bills, and I was not in debt. I even had full medical insurance."

A homeless person and their dog. | Photo: Shutterstock

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The man felt bad for him. He used to have everything, and now he was broke and homeless, so he asked, "What happened? Did you drink too much? Get mixed up in drugs? Did you go through a divorce?"

The homeless man sighed and said, "No, nothing like that. Because of the COVID-19 pandemic, I was unexpectedly paroled."

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AN INVITATION TO DINNER

A man was walking down the street on his way home when he was accosted by a rather dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked for a few dollars so he could buy himself dinner.

The man reached for his wallet and took out $10, but before he gave it to the homeless man, he asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy beer instead of something to eat?"

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The homeless man shook his head and said, "Beer? No. I gave up drinking many years ago."

The man then asked, "Will you spend this money on fishing then? Instead of dinner?"

The homeless man then said, "Fishing? No. I don't waste time trying to fish. I need to spend my time trying to stay alive."

The man responded, "Hmmm, and would you spend the money on hunting equipment?"

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"Are you CRAZY?" yelled the homeless man. "I have not gone hunting in over 20 years!"

The man then said, "Okay, I am not going to give you money. Instead, you can shower at my home and my wife will cook you a delicious home-cooked meal."

Surprised, the homeless man asked, "Won't your wife be angry that you brought a stranger home?"

And the man said, "Don't worry about that. It's important she sees what happens to a man when he stops drinking, fishing, and hunting."

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THE PALM READER

A jobless and broke 30-year-old man decided to pay a visit to a palm reading fortune-teller so he could get a better look at what the rest of his life had in store for him. He asked the palm reader, "What will my future be like?"

The fortune-teller said, "Until you are 42 years old, you will suffer thinking about your life getting ruined and worry about having a penniless, worthless, unproductive, and wasted life."

The man swallowed hard and said, "Well, what happens when I turn 42?" The fortune-teller then said, "Well, you will stop thinking about it."

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