Daily Joke: Three Vampires Compete for the Title of Most Vicious

Three vampires decided to have a contest to determine who is the most vicious amongst them. The strongest one led the trio.

"Watch this," he said as he flew very fast at a speed of about 100 miles/hour. Then, a mere ten minutes later, he returned with blood all over his mouth.

"What happened?" The other two asked. In reply, the strongest vampire pointed at a house and stated that he had just slaughtered the entire family who resided there, sucking every ounce of blood in them.

His colleagues praised him for such a cruel demonstration; they had expected no less from the strongest of them. The oldest among them went next.

"Watch and learn," he eerily rasped as he took off into the skies, flying even faster than the first vampire at about 120 miles/hour.

He returned in half the length of time it took the strongest, and blood covered his mouth and neck. When asked what happened, he pointed to a village and declared that he had sucked the blood of every last human who occupied it dry.

He was also praised for the show of might; as the oldest, he was expected to be more powerful. But the last vampire was the quickest one.

As he took off, he warned them not to blink as they would miss his movement. Airborne, he flew at a pace of 140 miles/hour and returned only after a mere 30 seconds.

He also had blood all over his mouth, neck, and nose. His colleagues wanted to know what he did, but he replied with a question of his own.

"Did you see that big damn tree over there?" They answered with a yes, which made him even more angry. Apparently, he had not.

ANOTHER VAMPIRE JOKE

A vampire, a zombie, and a ghost were all having fun at a party. The ghost decided to get something to eat, after which he immediately asked the zombie where the bathroom was.

He quickly located the place, conducted his business briskly, and returned to get more food. He repeated the process a couple of times until the zombie got worried and asked if he felt okay. The ghost answered:

"I'm fine, the food's just going right through me."

Did you enjoy these jokes? Here is another one about a vampire bat who flew into a cave after a long night of hunting for food, only to be met with a series of questions from his other bat friends

Source: Upjoke