September 30, 2021
What would you do if your spouse came out as transgender? Would you accept them or leave them? People shared their stories on the internet about their partners coming out as trans. Their reaction showed what it means to love someone unconditionally.
It isn't easy for people to come out as transgender. They do it after years of feeling alienated from their body and months of repeating the same speech in their mind. They state the truth without knowing how the other person would react.
After the recent surge in awareness about transgender people, people have started accepting them. They treat them the way they treat straight people and don't judge them for their choices. However, people from previous generations are still struggling to accept them. It's a new concept for them that takes time to digest.
WOMAN HID HER TRANS HUSBAND FROM HER FAMILY
Coming out as a trans in front of your spouse is easier than telling their parents about it. A Redditor opened up about hiding her husband's actual orientation from her parents. She knew he was transgender before they got married, so they had decided to adopt kids in the future.
However, the Redditor's parents did not know the reason behind their decision to adopt. They thought there was some fertility issue, so they booked an appointment at the fertility clinic for the two of them. They had paid £320 at the clinic and bought £108 train tickets for the couple.
After her husband found out about the appointment, he decided to tell his wife's parents the truth. Without thinking about the consequences, he explained the entire situation to them. They were shocked to know the truth. The Redditor wrote:
"Since telling them, all hell has broken loose. They're furious we didn't tell them sooner, said they have a right to know who they were "allowing" into their family, and are fuming that they've put down money for a consultation/test we won't be having."
The parents expected their daughter and her husband to apologize to them and refund the money. The original poster thinks her parents weren't at fault because they booked the appointment out of sincere intentions. She asked other users for their opinions on the situation, and one of them replied:
"Seriously. It doesn't matter if he's trans. What if he had a traumatic accident and couldn't reproduce? It's not their business, and the "why" is unimportant. They were told the plan, but they got involved anyway."
Most users supported the Redditor and asked her not to stress over her parents' behavior. They said that her parents shouldn't interfere in the couple's life. Other users also objected to the parents' "gatekeeping" behavior, keeping an eye on who enters their family.
The parents also mentioned that they had saved the consultation fee, especially for the couple, so it was their daughter's fault that she didn't tell them about the truth sooner. Another user objected to their behavior and commented:
"This is what I can’t get over. Who in their right minds thinks that’s an appropriate present? If they’d been saying they were saving for an appointment sure but without discussion it’s crazy to get that for a couple."
It takes a lot of time and courage to come out as a trans. Some people do it while they are young, while others spend decades discovering their new identity. A woman's spouse came out as a trans after they had lived their life like a straight couple.
WOMAN'S SPOUSE CAME OUT AS TRANS AFTER MARRIAGE
A few years after marriage, Lauren's husband came out as a trans. They discussed this topic for a decade until her spouse decided to reveal the truth one night. He spoke about wanting to transition into the other gender, and the woman understood his feelings without judging him.
While the couple's friends thought they would split, the woman supported her spouse. Although she wasn't sure about living with a woman for the rest of her life, she still managed to support her spouse during their time of need.
She watched him turn into a woman and shopped new clothes that complimented her body. She refers to her spouse as her "wife," who looks after the kids when she's not there. Lauren and her wife also have arguments and fights, but they sort out their differences like every other couple at the end of the day.
SHE MET HER AT WORK BEFORE HER TRANSITION
This couple has been married for 33 years. It was only eight years after their marriage that Barbara found out the truth. Finding women's clothes in her husband's wardrobe made her think he was having an affair. She was relieved to know that it was him who wore those clothes.
Barbara met her spouse Jane at work. They used to teach at the same school, and both of them had recently separated from their spouses. Jane dressed as a female and went to trans clubs at night while pretending to be straight during the day.
She ultimately had surgery, and now the couple goes in public without the fear of being judged. Whenever they meet new people, they discuss their journey, and people look at them in shock. Barbara supported Jane from the first day, which made it easy for Jane to come out.
WOMAN WASN'T READY FOR HER PARTNER'S TRANSITION
Liz's husband came out as a trans 20 years after their marriage. They did not discuss it. It was sudden, and Liz was speechless. She found out about it when her husband started wearing skirts to "feel better." Her husband came out on social media, and all their friends visited them with gifts for him.
Everyone assumed Liz was OK with the transition, but she was shocked and needed someone to talk to deep down. She accepted the new version of her husband because she wanted to stay with him. However, she has set some limits. She will leave her husband if they decide to go for surgery.
They are still happily married but still exploring the new phase of life. It's interesting to see so many different views on this topic. What's your take on it? How would you react if you found yourself in a similar situation? We'd love to know your opinions.
September 22, 2021