A man spoke his heart out on Reddit five years after his wife woke up from a coma. He confessed that he no longer loved his wife because he believed she was not the same person.
The man shared that he loved his wife before her brain injury, but he didn't feel the same anymore. He thinks his wife died the day she went into a coma.
However, he never disclosed his true feelings to anyone until he wrote a Reddit post. He wanted to share his secret with other Redditors to feel less burdened.
Source: Flickr/Jeff Adair
The Reddit user named CarerNotHusband shared that he met his wife in high school. He confessed that watching the "love of his life" fall into a coma wasn't easy. He explained:
"When she suffered a brain injury and fell into a coma, I had no idea whether she would ever wake up again."
His wife woke up from the coma, to his surprise, but things had changed. He said she was "severely disabled" and her personality had changed.
OP's wife suffered a brain injury | Source: Unsplash
At first, the man thought he could revive his wife's personality before the accident through therapy. He confessed his wife's new nature wasn't flawed, but he wanted her to be like the person he fell in love with.
He concluded his post by sharing his biggest secret.
After several years of therapy and treatment, his wife didn't change. OP (Original Poster) revealed his wife was the same for the last five years despite him wishing she had changed.
She woke up from the coma as a different person | Source: Unsplash
After his wife woke up from the coma, he hoped he would fall in love with her new personality, but he couldn't. He couldn't force himself to fall in love with her. He confessed:
"The truth is my wife died the day she was injured."
Since he had fallen out of love, OP secretly started to resent his wife. He believed her new personality had taken his wife away.
He believed her new personality had taken his wife away | Source: Unsplash
He also understood that it wasn't his wife's fault, but he couldn't stop himself from resenting her. Despite how he felt, he knew he couldn't leave her because she had no one to take care of her. He also didn't want to lose his wife's smile, laugh, and voice. He explained:
"I couldn't bear to lose those, they're all I have left of the woman I love."
OP concluded his post by sharing his biggest secret; he had spent the last five years pretending he loved his wife. He also pretended that he didn't notice how she had changed.
He pretended she hadn't changed | Source: Unsplash
"She's lost a lot of the goofiness and cheekiness she had before."
He also revealed that her sense of humor wasn't the same, and she had developed different interests. She remembered only a few things from her life before the injury, and one of them was that she loved OP.
He posted his story on Reddit | Source: Unsplash
However, she lost memory about more minor things like hobbies and interests. He also shared that she knew her personality had changed, but she wasn't aware of how significant the change was.
happy-pilot-wife shared that her mother went through something similar and it took her ten years to revert back to the person she was before the injury.
Another user shared that her mother went through something similar | Source: Unsplash
She confessed that it was difficult to watch her mother have a completely different personality. Her father also suffered in silence, watching his wife become another person.
The Redditor asked her father if he would leave his mother, but he said he had "married her for better or worse and sickness and health." She shared her story to motivate OP to stay with his wife, hoping she would eventually become the person she was.
Most people felt sorry for OP and told him to stay strong. Some users also shared similar stories to motivate OP never to give up.
Her father said he wouldn't leave her mother | Source: Unsplash
Questions to Ponder:
Do you think seeking professional help could solve OP's problem?
OP shared that his wife underwent therapy, but it didn't help. It might be true that he had spent a lot of time trying to bring his wife's old personality back, but should he seek couples therapy to solve the problem? Some people might think couples therapy might help OP love his wife as before. It might also change his wife's personality for the better.
Would you leave your wife if you were OP?
His post said he wouldn't leave his wife because he knew no one would care for her. Some people might think he has done a lot for his wife, and he needs to move on because it has started taking a toll on his mental well-being. However, some people might disagree, saying he should stay with his wife because her personality might improve over time.
If you enjoyed reading this story, you might like this one about a delivery man who ruined a woman's Christmas by leaving with her order.
All images are for illustration purposes only. Share your story with us; maybe it will change someone's life. If you would like to share your story, please send it to email@example.com