It felt unusual when the little girl woke up and didn't find her mother around. Worried, she looked for her in the house and found her father curled up in a corner, sobbing while holding her notebook in his hand.
The 24-year-old woman recalled the painful memories of her mother abandoning her. She left a note in a notebook explaining why she abandoned her husband and children.
Sixteen years later, the woman wrote a Reddit post under the username ThrowRAfarmer after her mother's sudden return. She explained her feelings and confessed she had kept a secret from her brother all these years.
Source: Flickr/Jesse Radonski
OP's (Original Poster's) parents were high school sweethearts who dated for a couple of years and welcomed her a month after their prom night. After graduating, they moved to a small rural town and settled into their new lives before having their second child.
One day, 7-year-old OP woke up for school and felt unusual because she couldn't spot her mother around. While looking for her, she found her father curled up in a corner, sobbing while holding her notebook in his hand.
The soul-crushing sight of her father crying made her burst into tears, after which her father composed himself and picked her up.
The girl found her father crying after she woke up. | Source: Unsplash
However, he didn't tell her what her mother wrote in the notebook. She stumbled upon the notebook a year later and read why her mother abandoned her 7-year-old daughter and a month-old son.
Sixteen years after OP was abandoned, her mother returned to her hometown because she planned to settle there permanently.
Her mother confessed she never wanted to have children, and the small-town life was suffocating her. "The second child, my brother was the final noose that wouldn't let her breath [sic]," OP stated.
Her mother wrote a note before she left. | Source: Unsplash
After her mother left, OP's father had lost the motivation to live his life. He stopped taking care of himself and missed his wife badly.
However, after OP's aunt and uncle talked to him, he realized he needed to live for his children. He gathered himself and worked on the farm during the day, while OP looked after her brother and managed the house chores after school.
Since there were only three people in the family, they didn't have many expenses, so most of their earnings went to their savings that they later used for OP's brother's college.
OP's father worked on the farm. | Source: Unsplash
Her father insisted she should also have a college fund for herself, but she said no because she didn't have time to focus on her studies due to her domestic responsibilities.
Sixteen years after OP was abandoned, her mother returned to her hometown because she planned to settle there permanently. After modeling for more than a decade, the woman had saved enough money to buy a house and a piece of land in the same town.
She tried talking to OP, but OP refused because she couldn't forgive her mother for abandoning them. When she arrived, OP's brother was in college, so she didn't meet him.
OP's mother returned sixteen years later. | Source: Unsplash
On the other hand, OP sensed her father was still in love with his wife. She tried fixing him up on dates, but none worked out. That summer, he started dating OP's mother, and that didn't sit well with OP, while her brother was over the moon with joy.
During the summer break the same year, her brother returned, so her father invited her mother for dinner. OP didn't expect much of a reaction from her brother, but seeing him so excited surprised her.
At the dinner, OP didn't speak unless someone talked to her. The following day, her brother asked her why she behaved so strangely around their mother. When she asked him why he was so happy about her return, he replied:
"Why wouldn't I be happy, I finally have a mother, WE finally have a mother"
Her brother was happy to see his mother. | Source: Unsplash
Furious, OP yelled at her brother. She told him it was she who looked after him all these years and loved him as her mother should have.
She felt even worse because she couldn't tell her brother about the note their mother left before abandoning them. She didn't want to ruin the moments he enjoyed with his mother.
Moreover, whenever she yelled at her mother or reminded her of what she wrote in the notebook, her mother never screamed back at her. She only apologized, which bothered OP even more.
She felt worse because she couldn't tell her brother about the note. | Source: Unsplash
Before concluding her Reddit post, OP questioned why she was resentful towards her family. "Did I resent the fact that I stayed here on the farm, not going to college?" she asked.
She also confessed feeling resentful towards her father and brother because they forgave her mother and welcomed her. At the end of her post, she sought advice on what she should do.
"Her abandonment is a trauma, and she can't expect to come back and think everything is ok, regardless of how your brother and father are reacting," Redditor Caribouhou stated.
She sought advice from other Redditors. | Source: Unsplash
The Redditor suggested family therapy because it seemed like both OP and her father and brother resented each other for their reactions to her mother's return. The user added:
"I think you’re in an impossible situation and college might be good for you."
"None of us ever had professional help when it comes to mental health, and it feels like it would be such a claustrophobic, uncomfortable experience," OP replied.
OP felt therapy would make her feel uncomfortable. | Source: Pexels
"Hard disagree that you should continue to hide the truth of her leaving from your brother."
Other Redditors agreed that OP should tell her brother about the note their mother left so that he could understand her feelings. Most Redditors suggested that she go for therapy and talk to her family members to clarify misunderstandings.
A Redditor suggested for her to start college, but she was reluctant. | Source: Unsplash
Questions to Ponder:
Do you think going for therapy would help OP?
Many Redditors suggested OP go for therapy because she had so many feelings bottled up inside her. They thought a therapist could help her decide what to do next. However, she felt uncomfortable going for therapy because she had never done that before. Would you consult a therapist if you were OP?
Do you think her father was at fault for not acknowledging her feelings?
Despite knowing what the girl went through, her father didn't acknowledge her feelings when her mother returned. Instead, he welcomed her with open arms and started dating her. Had he addressed her resentment and talked to her about her feelings, it might have helped the girl cope with the situation. What do you think?
If you enjoyed reading this story, you might like this one about a man who left the hospital room after the birth of his second baby.
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