Teen Girl Chooses to Live With Her Father over Her Mother after Dad Cheats on Mom

A sense of astonishment swept over a woman as her teen daughter revealed her heartfelt desire to reside with her father following their divorce. The lingering question remained: Why did the teenager yearn to live with the very man responsible for shattering their family?

On May 30, 2023, an anonymous 19-year-old female poster shared her story in the "AITA" subreddit. She had grown up within a family dynamic characterized by a significant imbalance. Her relationship with her father had always been strong, marked by compatibility and a deep connection.

Her father played a more prominent role in her upbringing than her mother, consistently prioritizing family over his job. In contrast, her mother seemed more dedicated to her career than to being a part of her daughter's life, creating a growing divide between them.

Why Did OP Choose Her Dad?

While the poster didn't harbor any animosity towards her mother, the emotional connection with her was far from the one she shared with her father. The mother's professional commitments consistently took precedence over the family, leading to a situation where it felt as if the parents weren't truly married.

Additionally, the mother perceived her daughter's choice as a profound betrayal.

However, a sudden revelation rocked the family's foundation. The mother ended up uncovering her husband's affair with a co-worker, which had been ongoing for the past two months. Consequently, the couple decided to head for a divorce.

Thereafter, the mother instructed her daughter to start packing her belongings, as they were planning to move into a new apartment as soon as she could secure a lease. But despite her father's transgressions, the daughter was hesitant about moving out with her mom. She felt more comfortable staying with her father, believing that he would continue to provide her with the support and care he always had, in stark contrast to her mother.

When the original poster communicated her desire to live with her dad, her mother "had a mental breakdown." Accusations were hurled, and the mother blamed OP's father for breaking up the family and causing immense personal pain.

Additionally, the mother perceived her daughter's choice as a profound betrayal. Overwhelmed by her mom's emotional turmoil, the daughter found herself grappling with a complex and challenging situation. Seeking insight and perspective, OP turned to the Reddit community with the question, "AITA?"

The Online Response

Several commenters expressed that the anonymous poster was not in the wrong (NTA). They pointed out that the father's act of infidelity, while hurtful and disruptive, was not a straightforward matter. Moreover, they emphasized that both the mother and father might not provide an entirely accurate account of the events due to their emotional states. They encouraged OP to make her own decision.

The consensus among commenters was that OP was not at fault for wanting to live with her father, given her closer relationship with him. Some advised caution, recognizing that her dad's trustworthiness had been called into question. They also suggested spending time with both parents and considering a balanced split.

Furthermore, they emphasized that OP should clarify with her father if she were welcome to live with him, as both parents had assumed she would live with her mother. Additionally, they pointed out that the father's ability to provide support might be uncertain.

Commenters generally supported OP's choice to live with her father based on her comfort and relationship with him. They acknowledged that the dad's actions were selfish and wrong, affecting OP's living situation directly. Some users questioned the father's character due to his infidelity and suggested that the dynamics of living with him and the other woman might change. They encouraged OP to have a reality check.

Redditors generally did not assign blame to OP or her mother but suggested that her mom owed her an apology. They mentioned that her mother might feel as though the father "won" everything, including the child's loyalty. Some commenters empathized with the mother's difficult situation and suggested that OP should maintain contact to support her during this challenging time.

Some Redditors encouraged OP to consider her mom's perspective. They acknowledged the devastating impact of the father's actions on the mother. While they recognized OP's difficult position, they reminded her that her father's actions had led to the current situation.

Do you support OP's decision to live with her father? Click here to read another story about a wife who received a visit from a woman who claimed to have a family with her husband.