Am I Wrong for Buying a Birthday Gift for My Friends' Daughter?

Nancy is close to her friends, Mike and Sarah's daughter, Lily. So, for her birthday, she goes all out and gets Lily something that she knows the little girl would love. But things quickly get out of hand when Lily's parents forget her birthday.

I didn't think that I would be in this dilemma. I come from a large family with four siblings who have children. So, I have unlocked the "cool aunt" status, giving the best birthday presents I could for all my nieces and nephews.

Now, my close friends, Sarah and Mike, have decided to end their marriage, which hit our close-knit friend group like a freight train. While the rest of us have been unlucky in love, Sarah and Mike were the two who went from high school sweethearts to getting married and having Lily, their daughter.

But even their constant bickering and emotional turmoil made it clear that the fairytale had ended.

Lily is more than just a 'friend's kid' — we've been close since she was born. I remember standing in the hospital waiting room with a gift bag full of clothes for her, ready to run when visiting hours began. Lily is as close to me as my nieces and nephews.

So, Lily is a little girl with big dreams. Even now, at almost twelve years old, she wants to be an architect when she grows up. She also has an obsession with the Singapore skyline.

With everything going on at home, I felt Lily deserved something special for her birthday. So, I settled on a LEGO Singapore Architecture set I knew she would love.

The big day arrived, and I couldn't have been more excited to see Lily and hand her the birthday present. Before going to their home, I also stopped at a bakery to get a cake. All was well.

Until I got to the house.

"Happy birthday, Sweetheart," I said when she opened the door.

"Oh, Aunt Nancy," Lily said. "You remembered!"

It turns out that Sarah and Mike forgot Lily's birthday. I know they were going through things, but it was their daughter's birthday, which needed to be celebrated in some capacity.

The look on Lily's face when she realized that her parents had forgotten her birthday was heart-wrenching. She tried to hide her disappointment, but it was written all over her face.

And then it got even weirder. Instead of Sarah and Mike owning up to their mistake, they turned the tables on me.

"Lily, take your gift to your room," Sarah told her. "You can play there."

Then, they confronted me.

"Couldn't you have sent us a reminder?" Sarah spat out, her voice edged with anger.

Mike, not one to be excluded in a conversation, chimed in, too.

"We're going through a lot right now, Nancy," he said. "And you know all about it. You should have texted and reminded us it was Lily's birthday."

I stood there, holding the cake, baffled.

"Hold on, aren't you her parents?" I said calmly. "Shouldn't you remember your own daughter's birthday?"

I tried to explain that it was their responsibility and that I couldn't understand how they could forget something so important — impending divorce or not.

That's when things went from bad to worse. They got angrier and accused me of meddling in their lives. They even wanted to take Lily's birthday present away. Were they really going to snatch away the one birthday present that their child had gotten?

But they suddenly stopped talking when Lily started crying from the hallway — having overheard the entire conversation. Instead, they just asked me to leave.

I walked out of the house without hesitation, taking the cake with me. Now, I'm sitting on my couch, eating my feelings and trying to make sense of the entire scenario.

I understand that Sarah and Mike are trying to separate — it's complicated. But I am also a child of divorce, and I remember that when my parents were going through the process, they made sure that my siblings and I were loved and cared for.

They ensured that even though they were 'breaking up,' they would not break up the family — and celebrating the important days was a large part of this.

Now, I'm feeling disappointed for Lily. I thought I was doing something good that would make her birthday memorable — in addition to her parents, not despite it.

I also feel heartbroken for Lily and my relationship with her parents because I don't know what will happen next.

Was I wrong for getting Lily a birthday present? And should I have reminded her parents about her birthday?

What would you have done?

Here's another story for you: Ellen is a waitress who ensures her daughter, Kiara, gets everything she needs. But when she begins to throw tantrums fueled by her ungratefulness, Ellen is at her wit's end. So, she tries to teach her daughter a lesson for her birthday.

Read the full story here.