Am I Wrong for Wanting to Break up with My Partner of 15 Years after What I Found While Cleaning Our Home?

A woman found out her husband kept specific details of their will agreement from her. She is now torn between divorcing him and making him suffer the consequences instead.

A 42-year-female divulged on Reddit that she discovered something about her husband and that their marriage now hangs in the balance. She expressed feeling "embarrassed" about discussing her financial issues online because it is often "frowned upon."

"And I agree that I am not entitled to anything I didn't work for. I live by this, and I have since I was 16 been my 'provider' even though I come from a stable and well-off family," wrote the Original Poster (OP).

The woman said she values independence and even started her own company when she was 26. The business was a success until COVID-19 hit, and it nearly went bankrupt.

However, she managed to turn things around, and the company now makes a "good living," although it is not the same as before the global pandemic. Still, money has never been an issue for OP because she has saved enough to weather the storm by living within her means.

OP noted why she disclosed this information by explaining that her partner's betrayal is more about trust and love for her than monetary things. Still, she failed to convince her loved ones about this when she told them she was going to leave him because of his will.

OP and her 53-year-old husband have been together since 2009 and started living together in 2011. They both make good money and have since purchased a penthouse together.

Around that period, they began assessing their lives by thinking of the future and, morbidly, death. OP further explained how they would divide their fortune:

"We wrote wills that we inherited each other because we thought that the one leaving earlier could be in peace knowing the other will not have to worry about moving or lowering their standards."

At the time, OP made more money than her husband. Amid the pandemic, he was supportive and made her feel like she could sit around without contributing to their household expenses and still be okay.

She spent one year not taking a salary from her company and used her savings, but her spouse was the one making a significant contribution towards their household. Since COVID-19, OP's husband started making more money than her.

At some point, the couple attempted to re-evaluate their living situation but figured they did not need to downsize. But things dramatically changed between the couple when OP discovered her spouse's "NEW will" made in 2022 while deep cleaning their apartment. She revealed:

"He only leaves me 10% and 10% to his mother (something we already agreed on) the rest goes to his sister and her family. I was shocked because we never talked about this, and he never told me."

OP said her husband remains her sole beneficiary, apart from the 10% both of them agreed should go to their mothers. She further explained that her partner's sister and her husband experienced difficult times after she got fired from her high-paying job and the spouse lost his job amid the pandemic.

The couple had accumulated a lot of debt throughout the years but are technically not poor. Their home situation is just different from before. OP said the pair are even more well off than her siblings.

"But never has it occurred to me or my family that they would inherit me the same way I didn't expect to inherit them. I feel nauseous. I want to leave him. I feel betrayed. The thought makes me so hurt," OP penned.

She expressed that it is not only that her husband is being unfair with his decision, but it is worse that he never told her about it. Regardless, OP said she loves her spouse and could ignore this adjustment on his part, or she could do the same thing he did by changing her will without him knowing. This way, her siblings can be her heirs too and "leave him with crumbs."

OP said she was heartbroken over this and asked fellow Reddit users what they thought about her situation. Several of them shared that she is within her right to leave her husband after uncovering his betrayal.

Do you think OP is making the right decision about wanting to leave her spouse because of his deception? Should the husband have told her that he had changed his will? What would you have done if you were in OP's position?

Read more about a widow who kicked her stepson out of their home after his father's death and kept all her husband's money to herself.