Am I Wrong for Wanting to Ban My Fiancé's Daughter from Our Wedding after What She Did?

A Reddit user shared her distressing story about her future stepdaughter's unacceptable behavior. The incidents caused a rift, leading to an extreme proposition.

In December 2021, a 37-year-old American female Reddit shared that she had met her fiancé, a 46-year-old Canadian-Lebanese man, three years before.

The man had a 23-year-old daughter, "Najwa" who had been strongly against him parting ways with her mother. The Original Poster (OP) had no role in her fiancé's past separation, which occurred two years before they met.

Despite a promising start, Najwa's behavior toward OP deteriorated, escalating to damaging OP's car and legal documents, including her passport, to prevent her from traveling with her dad. Najwa justified her actions by claiming she was influenced by her mother and was pressed by her.

"I did my best to let things go and she stopped and we sort of started getting along again until her dad and I announced our marriage date," said OP.

Najwa's antics didn't stop at property damage. OP remembered what transpired next after the couple divulged when they would eventually walk down the aisle, sharing:

"She literally angerily screamed at us at dinner table but the next minute said 'congratulation[s]' with [a] huge smile on her face."

Najwa took her hostility to a new level by ruining OP's wedding dress with wall paint, a treasured item for OP, who was looking forward to her first marriage experience. OP was not home at the time and once she returned, Najwa was not there.

The incident, captured by a door camera, left OP devastated and led to a confrontation in which Najwa denied her actions. Despite making a police report, OP was persuaded to drop the matter after Najwa's boyfriend compensated for the dress.

"Everything was expected to go back to normal but I was done with her (she didn't even apologize)," OP wrote. Fed up, she considered a restraining order against Najwa for her relentless behavior because she had reached a breaking point.

However, this decision was met with resistance from her fiancé, who found the idea of a restraining order excessive and insisted on Najwa's presence at their wedding.

He suggested postponing any legal actions until after the wedding, emphasizing the importance of Najwa's presence to him. OP recalled, "He said I already got paid for the dress and he'll get her to apologize."

OP's refusal to back down led to a significant disagreement, highlighting a stark contrast in their perspectives on handling the situation. Her fiancé called her "cruel" by refusing to understand how much it would mean to him to have Najwa at their wedding.

But OP had reached a breaking point and told her husband-to-be that she could have handled the situation differently by having Najwa charged, instead, she considered a restraining order so that they could exchange wedding vows without having her there.

She revealed, "He said I was unreasonable to think he'd support me in this and begged that I reconsider cause this will ruin his relationship with her forever."

The situation put OP in a difficult position as she was torn between asserting her right to a peaceful wedding day and maintaining family harmony.

Her fiancé's plea to reconsider for the sake of his relationship with his daughter and the in-laws' interventions only added to the complexity of the dilemma.

Despite acknowledging her fiancé's supportive nature, OP remained conflicted over the potential long-term impact on their family dynamics. She expressed worry about the potential damage to her relationship with her stepdaughter, her fiancé, and her in-laws.

Concluding her post, OP explained to Redditors that she felt she could be morally wrong for how she handled the situation, seeing that this was her future stepchild and the animosity would ruin the relationship between her and the family.

The Reddit community's response to her situation offered varied perspectives, providing OP with a broader view of her dilemma. Some of the fellow users showered her with support, stating that she was not in the wrong while others suggested she leave her future husband for the sake of her sanity.

Was OP right to insist on banning her fiance’s daughter from their wedding? What would you have done if you were in OP’s position?

Read more about an individual who took their stepson a lesson after for continuously littering all over the place.