Here's How God Tried to Create Earth but Ended up with Something Else Instead
God tried to create the earth, but unforeseen circumstances made him end up with what he never intended.
Once upon a time, God made heaven and earth, but shortly after, a class action got filed against him on the ground that he neglected to file an environmental impact report.
God filed for and obtained a permit for heaven, but could not get one for the earth because there was an order for him to stop creating it.
He appeared before a hearing, and when they asked him why he decided to start the earth part, the creator said he loves bringing things into existence.
To prove his point, he said, “Let there be light,” and the officials stopped him, to find out the source of the light, and if it would require strip mining that would result in pollution.
God explained that it would be a ball of fire, and the officials told him he would need permission for the building to house the light, and to conserve energy, they told him to leave the light on for half the day.
The creator conceded their point, stating he would call the light “Day” and the darkness “Night.”
Next, he asked the earth to bring out green herbs and many seeds, and the EPA told him it was okay, as long as he used native seeds.
Then, God asked the water to bring out creatures with life, and the air to bring forth birds. At this, the officials said he needed permission from the games department, in conjunction with the authorities in heaven.
After this, God thought everything was settled and informed the hearing that he would take six days to create everything.
The officials then countered this, saying it would take about two hundred days to get the necessary permits, hold a public hearing, and ten to eleven months…
Not interested in hearing what else they had to say, God went and created hell.
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