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Daily Joke: Little Old Lady Offers a Tour Bus Driver a Handful of Peanuts

Odette Odendaal
Jul 31, 2019
10:30 A.M.

Bus drivers can probably fill volumes of books with stories about encounters they had with passengers. In today’s joke of the day, its all about funny situations drivers can experience. Enjoy!

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QUESTIONS BETTER LEFT UNASKED

One day while driving along deep in thought, a friendly old lady brought the driver on the tour bus back to the present with a tap on the shoulder.

“My apologies, I didn’t mean to startle you,” the lady said. “I just wanted to offer you some peanuts.”

Peanuts. Source: Pixabay.

Peanuts. Source: Pixabay.

The driver accepted with a smile, and gratefully finished the peanuts in no time. A half an hour later, the lady came back with more peanuts which the driver soon polished off as well.

However, after the lady offered him peanuts for the sixth time, the driver became curious and asked, “Why don’t you eat the peanuts yourself?”

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“I can’t chew because I have no teeth,” the lady replied. Feeling more confused, the driver asked, “But why do you buy peanuts if you can’t eat them?”

The lady smiled and said, “Oh, I just love the chocolate around them.”

A sightseeing bus full of people. | Source: Freepik/valeria_aksakova.

A sightseeing bus full of people. | Source: Freepik/valeria_aksakova.

GETTING AHEAD OF THE SITUATION

At Sam, the bus driver’s second stop for the day, the biggest man he had ever seen got into the bus. His towering physique barely fit through the door, and once he towered over Sam, the giant of a man said, “Big Eric doesn’t pay” and barrelled towards his seat.

Given Sam’s scrawny stature, he thought it wise to avoid an altercation and continued to let Big Eric onto the bus for almost a week. But then Sam got upset because everyone else had to pay while Big Eric got away with not paying because of his size.

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Sam decided to remedy the situation by taking up body-building and daily training sessions at the gym. As Sam’s muscles grew, his fear of Big Eric got less until he eventually had the guts to take him on.

A man training in the gym. | Source: Freepik.

A man training in the gym. | Source: Freepik.

As expected, Big Eric got on Sam’s bus during his second stop for the day and growled, “Big Eric doesn’t pay.” However, this time, Sam’s bravery took over as he stood up with wobbly legs. “Oh, yeah?” Sam said through clenched teeth. “And why doesn’t Big Eric pay?”

“Because Big Eric has a bus pass,” the giant of a man replied.

Much like other professions and institutions, the postal service has also been the butt of many jokes. In a related daily joke, a man with arthritis went looking for help at the local Post Office.

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