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January 14, 2021

Daily Joke: Doctor Decides to Teach Patient a Lesson

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A woman who does not believe in medicine goes to a doctor for a diagnosis but refuses to listen to what he has to say. The doctor decides to teach her a lesson that she will never forget. 

Karen stared at her chocolate brownie as the ice cream atop it slowly started to melt into the plate. It was a warm Sunday afternoon, and she had taken herself out for lunch because she was in no mood to cook.

The restaurant around the corner served the best pasta in town. Karen loved it, but for some reason, she could not finish the bolognese that had been sitting on her plate for nearly 20 minutes. 

A plate of spaghetti. | Source: Pexels/cottonbro

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The brownie she ordered for dessert looked tempting when the waiter brought it to the table, but Karen could not eat it after the first bite. She picked on the ice cream with the dessert spoon, wondering why she was losing her appetite every day.

The homeopathic tonic that Karen was taking to induce hunger was of no help. She had to do something about it because lately, she had been feeling pretty drained and hazy, too.

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As the rich mint choco chip dripped down the now soggy dessert, Karen gestured to the waiter to bring her check. While she waited, she called up the hospital to set an appointment for the next day to get a diagnosis.

On Monday morning, Karen drove herself to the hospital. On her way in, she passed a woman who was putting a bottle of cough syrup inside a paper bag.

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"Ugh, the vile things people put in their bodies in the name of medicine," she thought. "Just go home and make yourself a damn cup of chamomile tea, why don't you?!"

I believe in the power of faith-based approaches and healing crystals — they have never let me down...

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When the doctor was ready to see her, she approached him with a smile. "Doctor, I've not been feeling well lately," she said. After a brief talk, he advised her to do several tests. 

The next day, Karen went to the hospital and impatiently sat in the lounge while waiting for the nurse to call her. "Karen Jones?" the nurse's voice rang out. Karen went inside the doctor's cabin. 

"Ms. Jones, I hope you are doing good. I checked your lab reports, and I'm afraid I have some bad news for you..."

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"Don't you dare give me that nonsense you bureaucratic paper pusher! Just tell me what's wrong with me so that I can go buy some good homeopathic medicine," she barked out of nowhere, taking the doctor by surprise.

"I believe in the power of faith-based approaches and healing crystals — they have never let me down. Now, will you please go ahead and do things my way, or should I talk to the management?"

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"Whoa, miss, calm down. We will do things your way. Let's go with an astrology-based approach, shall we?"

Karen's frown turned into a modest smile. "That works for me, thank you!"

"So tell me, Ms. Karen, what is your birth sign?" the doctor asked. 

"Cancer," Karen said with a hint of pride. 

"Well, well... what a coincidence."

Here's another one about an elderly woman who was chatting with fellow beachgoers. 

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