One day, Barack Obama walked into a bar to get a drink, but he was invisible. The bartender asked him what happened. He asked for a beer and proceeded to share his story.
An invisible Barack Obama walked into a cozy little bar to kickoff his Friday night. A bartender started in his direction, squinting.
The bartender moved closer to Obama. "Okay... tell me why you're invisible." "A beer, please," Obama said. "I'll tell you what happened."
Former US President Barack Obama answers questions at the Gates Foundation Inaugural Goalkeepers event on September 20, 2017 in New York City. | Source: Getty Images
The bartender served him a pint of beer. "So it was a sunny day yesterday, so I thought I'd head out to the beach...," Obama said as he took a sip.
"There, I found a bottle that said, 'Rub me.' Rub, I did. Smoke rose from the bottle, so I threw it away out of fear," Obama said as he flung his hand forward.
"The genie was like, 'What's up, my dude? How are you doing?'" Obama took a big sip of the beer. "He then said I could have three wishes."
The bartender listened to Obama with his mouth wide open. "Please, go on, sir," he said.
"For my first wish, I said, 'This is profoundly important to me, genie. There is this woman I love, and her name is Michelle. I want her to marry me.'"
"That wish was granted," Obama smiled. "For my second wish, I said, 'I am deeply patriotic... I want to be the President of the United States so I can serve my motherland.' That wish was granted, too."
"And then, for my third wish, I started by saying, 'Let me be clear...'"
Like that joke? Here's another one about a hungry panda who walked into a bar. He ordered a small meal. The meal arrived, and he ate it all.
The panda got up to leave. "How was the meal, sir?" the waiter asked. Out of nowhere, the panda pulled out a gun and shot the waiter on the thigh.
"What the hell, panda?!" the waiter yelled. "What did you shoot me for?!"
The panda paused for a moment and said, "Look it up." Months passed and the waiter recovered well. One day, he decided to look up what the panda's deal was. A quick Google search showed him this result: "Panda: eats shoots and leaves."
If you liked the joke above, here's another one about a tired man who went to a bar.