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A Woman Spends a Lot of Effort on a Gift, And In Return She Gets Unpleasant Present Every Year

Salwa Nadeem
Sep 21, 2021
12:00 A.M.
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Birthdays are special occasions. When that special day comes around, people go out of their way to make their partners happy. However, sometimes they can do too much without realizing it, which sparked a compelling debate about relationships, money, and birthday gifts.

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Receiving a gift from your significant other is one of the best things about being in a relationship. According to Insider, the average amount spent by people on buying gifts for their partners is $100. Couples who have been together for more than one year have spent an average of $200. The research shows a direct proportion between the money spent and the number of years spent together.

Source: Amomama

Source: Amomama

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On the other hand, some married couples say they spend $0 buying presents for their spouse. Instead, they save money for something big like buying a house or vacationing in their favorite holiday destination. People on Reddit also talked about the topic, and users came up with some sensible gift-purchasing advice.

Gift wrapped in pink sheet with golden ribbon | Source: Unsplash

Gift wrapped in pink sheet with golden ribbon | Source: Unsplash

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HUSBAND MAKES WIFE FEEL GUILTY OVER BIRTHDAY GIFT

A 30-year-old female Redditor said she loves putting in effort when buying a birthday present for her 33-year-old husband. In the past, she has gifted him gaming equipment, a pair of his favorite sneakers, and expensive wristwatches while he consistently gave her the same chocolate bar year after year. She wrote:

"Last year I gifted him his favorite gaming device for his birthday after I went through trouble to obtain it and for $$$. Two months later was my birthday and he gifted me a chocolate bar again and I was frustrated and upset."

On his 33rd birthday, the Redditor got a keychain for her husband, and he wasn't happy about it. He got offended after opening the present because it was nothing like what she gave him every year. During their argument, she reminded him about the chocolate bar he gifts every year, he became upset.

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Kitkat chocolate bar | Source: Unsplash

Kitkat chocolate bar | Source: Unsplash

He said that since his wife was a doctor, she could afford expensive gifts, while he couldn't. He also added that their marriage was not a "transaction," and they shouldn't expect to benefit from each other. The Redditor asked other users if she was at fault, and one of them replied:

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"He said it himself."Our marriage is not a transaction where we're supposed to benefit from each other"Same goes for him."

Another user suggested saving the chocolate bar from her birthday and gifting it to him next year, so he realizes how it feels to receive that as a gift from your spouse. Some users called her husband a "hypocrite" and said he was greedy.

A Redditor suggested that the man doesn't need to buy expensive gifts. He can put in little effort and still win his wife's heart, just like her husband does. She mentioned that her husband spent $30 on her gift, and she was happy for the entire week.

Woman holding orange tulips bouquet | Source: Pexels

Woman holding orange tulips bouquet | Source: Pexels

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HOW MUCH SHOULD YOU SPEND?

So, how much should you spend on buying a birthday gift for your partner? Is $100 enough, or should it be more expensive? To be honest, there's no strict rule. It varies from person to person based on their budget. A wise Quora user suggested:

"What can you afford without hurting your budget? A lot? Then maybe spend a lot. Most people have a stricter budget. This may be one of the times that you should skip making your regular savings deposit, so as not to upset a delicately balanced budget."

Another user suggested talking to your partner and see what their expectations are. Some people like it when their spouses take them out to where they first met or gifted them a handmade birthday card. It all depends on what your significant other wants.

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Bouquet of roses | Source: Unsplash

Bouquet of roses | Source: Unsplash

A user on Quora asked an interesting question on the platform, saying, "If you have $4,000 to spend to celebrate your wife's 30th birthday, what would you do?" and other users responded in the most creative of ways. The user with the most upvoted comment said:

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"I would take her out to a nice $200 dinner and then give her a check for $3800 at dinner as her birthday gift."

Another person suggested taking their spouse on a Caribbean cruise with the $4,000 and leave the kids at their grandmother's place. What would you do if you had that budget to celebrate your significant other's birthday? We're sure there are a million ways to spend $4,000 on a birthday gift!

Happy birthday card beside gift | Source: Pexels

Happy birthday card beside gift | Source: Pexels

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WHAT DO THE EXPERTS SAY?

Most people are clueless when it comes to spending money on their spouse's birthday gifts. A relationship expert, Dr. Terri Orbuch, has some advice for couples. She said that the length of the relationship determines how much money one should spend on their partner's birthday gift. Most people are likely to look at the monetary value of a birthday present when they are in the middle of a relationship.

She also added that most people prefer gifts like handmade cards during the initial and later stages of a relationship. It's also important not to spend too much money on gifts at the beginning of a relationship because people are not usually sure about the other person at that time. A Redditor shared their horrible experience:

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"I accidentally spent like $400 on my ex's birthday and was only with him for 3 months and then four days later he spent valentine's day with another girl lmfao"

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The relationship expert also added that there's no harm in asking your significant other what they want as a gift. She suggests maintaining a list of presents and use it when their spouse's birthday arrives. She also emphasized managing expectations because people often buy expensive gifts that the other person doesn't need. It's best to put yourself in their shoes and think about what they want.

What do you think about this topic? How much is too much when it comes to spending money on your significant other's birthday present? We'd love to know what you think. Your comments are appreciated!

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