Father-To-Be Is Diagnosed with Infertility, Recalls Smelling a Stranger’s Perfume on His Wife Before
A couple decided to have babies but was hit with bad news after the husband was diagnosed with infertility. Later, the man battled his worst insecurities when his wife told him she was pregnant.
A husband took a unique plight to Reddit’s “relationship advice” sub to seek advice on his wife’s pregnancy. And the kicker? His doctors had just told him he was infertile and could NEVER conceive without surgery.
A 34-year-old IT consultant anonymously known as Throwawaymyspermazoa on Reddit opened up about his dilemma on the internet, explaining how his partner’s pregnancy unlocked his past agonies and some unavoidable speculations involving her infidelity.
Pregnancy announcement to some could be honey to the ears, but for the Redditor, it was a nightmare staring him in the eye. The Original Poster (OP) and his wife had been together for six years, married for three.
The couple dreamed about starting a family, but a significant bomb fell in their paradise when OP was diagnosed with azoospermia—a medical condition in which a man doesn’t produce enough sperm, thus leading to infertility. However, most cases are treatable, and fertility can be restored.
The only relief OP had after his diagnosis was its curability. Meanwhile, he and his wife, 33, continued being sexually active, resulting in the shocking pregnancy announcement. OP was sure he couldn’t have impregnated her as he was yet to receive treatment for his infertility, and this is where the problem came into play.
The man’s wife was overly delighted but missed noticing how he was torn between her pregnancy and his doctors telling him he couldn’t father a child without completing surgery.
OP sat on his speculations for a while but looked back to a few hints that echoed his wife could’ve cheated on him. He knew his wife’s marketing career often kept her at work for long hours late in the evening but grew concerned about a few visible signs.
The doctor told him he couldn’t impregnate a woman until surgery and asked him to ensure his wife was pregnant.
For instance, he knew his wife constantly used only one of two perfumes but returned home one night smelling completely different. As an add-on hint, the wink emoji text message he’d once spotted on her phone lock screen fueled further doubts.
The husband then reminisced about his ex-girlfriend’s cheating history and claimed to have battled with that scar until he moved on after meeting his now-wife.
Given his diagnosis, his wife’s pregnancy, and infidelity conspiracies brewing inside of him, OP feared the worst—the baby wasn’t his. The thought that he was soon dad to someone else’s child irritated him, and different scenarios played out in his mind when he finally turned to his wife for an explanation.
Surprisingly, the wife volunteered to get a paternity test. This jolted OP because he expected her to pull up a dramatic reaction. For some reason, he felt weird, so he decided to meet with his doctor to confirm his doubts or find out if there was a slim chance the baby was his.
When OP met his doctor, he was told his type of condition, obstructive azoospermia, still allowed chances of pregnancy despite the infertility diagnosis. However, the doctor told insisted he couldn’t impregnate a woman until surgery and asked him to ensure his wife was pregnant.
Meanwhile, OP discovered his wife had transferred half the amount from their joint checking account to hers, which bred more doubts in his mind as she hadn’t done this before.
However, the wife later clarified over the phone that she’d transferred the money in anticipation of any deductible payments she would need when she visited her doctor. Still, OP was unmoved and waited to meet her that night.
After sharing his thoughts with her, OP realized his wife had no clue how much he’d been affected by his ex’s infidelity and was reassured they would go through this together. He then gave an updated on how the issue had progressed, stating:
“She thought that an NIPP ASAP was a great idea, as long as we also get some kind of counseling together. I’m not big on therapy, but I can probably agree that it will most likely help.”
Meanwhile, OP’s wife offered him an open phone policy, and he ended up finding out that her female friend had sent the wink emoji text.
The husband claimed he felt a lot better sorting issues with his wife and said it was time for him to be a father. He later took a paternity test which came back with a positive outcome.
“The paternity test came back initially positive for anyone that’s going to see this :),” he happily concluded.
Questions to Ponder:
Why is it a good idea to discuss your insecurities with your spouse instead of speculating things?
OP was confident about his wife’s loyalty but still couldn’t keep from speculating over her infidelity due to the visible cues he’d noticed. Later, his wife volunteered to take a paternity test after he discussed his insecurities with her. Do you think OP could’ve handled the situation differently by discussing his insecurities with his wife much earlier? Would he have stopped doubting her loyalty this way?
If you were OP, how would you have dealt with learning about your wife’s pregnancy knowing your infertility diagnosis?
OP quickly speculated his wife was cheating on him as soon as he learned she was pregnant. At one point, he refused to believe it and even reconsulted with the doctor regarding his chances of conceiving despite his diagnosis. If you were OP, what would you have done?
If you liked this story, here’s how a man is compelled to take a paternity test after his friend tips him about his fiancée’s infidelity.
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