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Nicole Kidman Believed Adopting Kids Was Her 'Destiny' after Having Doubts about Giving Birth

Titi Dokubo
Mar 26, 2022
08:00 P.M.
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Nicole Kidman did not have biological children until she was in her 40s. Questions about giving birth rained on her through unsolicited advice from other people.


The actress answered all questions head-on and gave them her point of view on what the adoption meant to her.

She shares two children with her ex-husband Tom Cruise, whom they had adopted after she suffered from fertility issues.

Nicole Kidman at the 7th Annual Gold Meets Golden on January 04, 2020, in Los Angeles [left], Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise with their children Connor and Isabella in Sydney on January 24, 1996 [right] | Source: Getty Images


Nicole Kidman is an award-winning actress born on June 20, 1967, and made her film debut in 1983 when she starred in "Bush Christmas."

She made her breakthrough in the United States in 1989 with "Dead Calm," followed by "Billy Bathgate" in 1991, "Eyes Wide Shut" in 1999, and more.

The actress has made her mark in movies and series like "Aquaman," "Moulin Rouge!," "Bewitched," "Lion," "Australia," "Big Little Lies," and "Nine Perfect Strangers," among others.



Kidman and Tom Cruise met on the set of "Days of Thunder" in 1989, and after a year together, they married in a private ceremony on December 25, 1990, in Telluride, Colorado.

They became an "It" couple of the 1990s and even starred alongside each other in movies. According to Kidman, she was passionately in love with Cruise.

Eleven years later, Cruise filed for divorce from Kidman, citing irreconcilable differences. Even there were reports that it was an amicable split, Kidman felt blindsided.

Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise at the 1992 ShoWest in Las Vegas | Source: Getty Images



When Kidman and Cruise married at 22, she immediately wanted to be a mother. Shortly after marriage, she got pregnant but did not carry the pregnancy to term. Kidman said,

"From the minute Tom and I were married, I wanted to have babies. And we lost a baby early on, so that was really very traumatic."

Kidman suffered an ectopic pregnancy and had a miscarriage at 23 weeks. They told her that chances of her ever conceiving were doubtful, and the couple decided to adopt.


Kidman and Cruise adopted two children—Isabella, born on December 22, 1992, and Connor, born on January 17, 1995.

After her divorce, Kidman rarely ever talked about the separation. She doesn't talk about her current relationship with her adopted children either, despite reports of estrangement and the children's denial.

Nicole Kidman and her children Connor and Isabella at a game between the Los Angeles Lakers and the Miami Heat on December 25, 2004, in Los Angeles | Source: Getty Images


After her miscarriage, Kidman believed people didn't talk about such loss enough because it is massive grief for some women.

Wanting to have a baby at the time was a vast yearning for Kidman. She knew that having a child would be the flipside of going through the pains of the loss.



Kidman, who had a younger sister, liked the feeling of caring for someone. Her younger sister always told Kidman that she behaved too much like a mother.

Even while on set with younger actors, she told them what to do because of her eagerness to mother people. Her mothering trait was one she picked up as early as four years old.


Kidman revealed that many people "felt bad" for her not having biological children in the early days. Most of these people treated women who became mothers through adoption like they were a different kind of mother.

Kidman, who adopted two kids, always told people that it was her destiny, what she wanted, and they were her children. Her response had people backing off and apologizing.


Even some of her close friends she confided in still told her they hoped she would have biological children. However, she hopes the world is changing its perception of adoption. She said,

"I mean – whatever, right? Whether you're an adoptive mother, a foster mother, a biological mother – it's the emotion of attaching to a child and helping to guide them and rear them [that is important]."

She knew she would have a child from an early age, and it wouldn't matter how because she had always wanted a child. Then, she didn't know if she would ever give birth, but Kidman knew she would adopt.



After her divorce from Cruise, Kidman started planning a new life for herself. She had plans to buy herself a farm in a rural area in Oregon, move in there, and maybe become a single mother.

Then in 2005, she met Country musician Keith Urban at an event honoring Australians in America, held in Los Angeles. They married in 2006 and moved to a farm in Nashville.

After moving, Kidman and Urban got ready to start a family once she discovered that she was pregnant at 40. Kidman, who thought she would never get pregnant in her lifetime, knew it was a miracle.


Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman at the 28th Screen Actors Guild Awards on February 27, 2022, in Santa Monica | Source: Getty Images

However, she had many complications that she is always ready to speak about because it helps other women. She said,


"They told me I was probably not going to be able to have a child, a birth child. [...] And then, out of blue Sunday Rose appeared. So that's a very, very powerful thing to happen."

Kidman and Urban's daughter was born on July 7, 2008. Urban, who felt blessed and grateful, took to his social media to thank everyone who had them in their thoughts and prayers.


Before the birth of Sunday Rose, Urban got hands-on in preparation for her birth by attending Lamaze lessons even though he never knew the name of the class he was taking.

Kidman and Urban expanded their family with the arrival of their second daughter, Faith Margaret, on December 28, 2010. The couple opted for a surrogate with their second child.

Keith Urban, Sunday Rose, Nicole Kidman, and Faith Margaret at the Sydney airport on March 28, 2017 | Source: Getty Images


On Faith's arrival, the couple made a statement where they revealed that they were blessed and thankful for the gift of another baby.

In wanting to keep her family together while she works, Kidman gets to travel with her children. She sometimes feels terrible that she has to take them out of school but believes everyone has different paths.

Also, by traveling with them, her children have the opportunity to see things that they would typically not. Kidman also said that she wouldn't be able to do her roles without her family's support.

Kidman, whose family shares in everything she does, is also glad she has a supportive husband who is rock solid.