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A woman in a wedding dress | Source: Flickr/brandydopkins
A woman in a wedding dress | Source: Flickr/brandydopkins

I Told My Daughter I Wouldn’t Spend Another Dime for Her Wedding upon Seeing Her Dress

Salwa Nadeem
Nov 27, 2023
06:55 A.M.

When bride-to-be Olivia took her father to pay the vendors for her wedding, she also had to stop by the tailor for the final fitting of her dress. When she came out of the changing room, her father's eyes widened as he stared at her angrily.

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For most people, their family members are the only ones who support them in their time of need. They know they can rely on their parents and siblings during bad times, but sometimes, things don't go as planned.

A wedding dress. | Source: Unsplash

A wedding dress. | Source: Unsplash

The girl in today's story asked her parents to bear her wedding expenses because her husband-to-be couldn't pay for them. Everything went well until the girl took her father to the tailor shop to try on her wedding dress. However, his shock at seeing her in her dress prompted him to call off paying for her wedding.

The Father

Olivia's father, Reddit user TRADressDistress, took to Reddit after he saw his daughter's bridal dress at the tailor shop. Under the AITA sub, he shared details of what happened that day.

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Before jumping to the main story, the man revealed a bit about his family. He had four children with his wife—three daughters and a son. To support his children, the Redditor provided them some financial assistance by either paying for school fees, house downpayment, or wedding expenses.

Woman in a wedding dress. | Source: Unsplash

Woman in a wedding dress. | Source: Unsplash

The Wedding Dress

The father's story revolved around his wife's wedding dress, which she had made with her mother. Due to its sentimental value, she never gave it to anyone else, but she allowed her children to wear the gown at their weddings, on one condition: any alterations to the dress should only involve resizing and nothing more.

The couple's eldest daughter donned it at her wedding, while the youngest refused to wear it. Meanwhile, their daughter-in-law agreed to wear the dress at her reception, while her husband took photos with the dress, so he didn't feel left out. When it was their other daughter, Olivia's turn to get married, she agreed to wear her mother's dress and gave it to the tailor to get it fitted.

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Little did he know that he would be shocked to see his daughter a few minutes later.

A seamstress at work | Source: Unsplash

A seamstress at work | Source: Unsplash

Wedding Errands

Since the Redditor was open to providing his children with financial assistance, Olivia asked her father to cover all her wedding expenses. She took him to the vendors a month before the wedding to clear all the payments. At the end of their trip, they visited the tailor shop, where the man noticed something. He said:

"Olivia was really nervous and I figured it was just usual pre-wedding jitters and excitement."

A woman in a white dress. | Source: Unsplash

A woman in a white dress. | Source: Unsplash

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The man waited for Olivia to come out of the changing room after she stepped in for the final fittings. Little did he know that he would be shocked to see his daughter a few minutes later.

The Shock

When Olivia stepped out of the changing room wearing her wedding dress, her father looked at her with unbelieving eyes. He couldn't recognize his wife's dress. He only saw patches of the gown his wife wore to their wedding decades ago. He recalled:

"She took the straps, the sash, the train, and the embroidered top skirt and had it added to this new dress."

This wasn't how things were supposed to go. Olivia's mother had strictly told her not to do any major alterations to the dress, but she had an explanation for why she did what was forbidden.

Close-up of a man's eye | Source: Unsplash

Close-up of a man's eye | Source: Unsplash

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Her Explanation

In the midst of his anger, Olivia's father told her to explain to her mother when they reached home. Recalling the moment when his wife discovered what their daughter had done to her dress, he recounted:

"My wife was devastated."

A woman looking outside a window. | Source: Unsplash

A woman looking outside a window. | Source: Unsplash

According to Olivia, she had the dress altered because she was the last child to wear it, and since no one would wear it after her, she thought it would be okay to redesign it. She also said she had asked the tailor to return the remains of the original gown to her.

The Family’s Reaction

This explanation didn't satisfy Olivia's parents. In fact, her mother decided not to attend the wedding, while her father said he wouldn't pay for her wedding expenses anymore. He had even planned to cancel his payment at the tailor shop. He revealed:

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"Our youngest daughter thinks I've gone overboard, knowing Olivia planned her wedding with our help in mind, and without it, she can't finish paying for everything."

White dresses hanging on a stand | Source: Unsplash

White dresses hanging on a stand | Source: Unsplash

Meanwhile, Olivia's in-laws, who couldn't afford the wedding expenses, asked the man to reconsider paying for his daughter's wedding. They even suggested Olivia's parents stop talking to her after her wedding was over.

Comments from Readers

Olivia's father concluded his post by saying he knew he had committed to pay for her wedding expenses but felt he should cancel his offer after learning what she did with her mother's dress. He asked other Redditors if he was at fault for not paying for Olivia's remaining wedding expenses, to which a user replied:

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"NTA. She destroyed your wife's precious dress without even a thought."

A man using his phone | Source: Unsplash

A man using his phone | Source: Unsplash

Redditor mdthomas said what Olivia did was disrespectful to her mother. The user suggested that Olivia and her husband downsize their wedding if they can't afford the remaining expenses. Reddit user alexemalexem agreed, saying Olivia should have discussed her plans with her mother first. The user added:

"It doesn't matter that your daughter is the last one to use the dress - it doesn't give her the right to destroy/alter it."

Reddit logo on a screen | Source: Unsplash

Reddit logo on a screen | Source: Unsplash

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Reddit user LockWithoutAKey assured Olivia's father that he was not at fault and highlighted that his wife had already made it clear that no one could alter her dress. The Reddit user felt Olivia deliberately disrespected the rules and redefined the dress, knowing it would hurt her mother.

A white wedding dress | Source: Unsplash

A white wedding dress | Source: Unsplash

Another Redditor said Olivia's in-laws were also at fault for saying that her parents should stop talking to her after the wedding. The user added:

"Emotionally, it isn't the same, I know, but if you have all the pieces, a good seamstress can probably reassemble it to look original."

"I got the original dress back but not all of the pieces," the father replied. He said he could tell the seamstress about the missing parts and get the dress remade.

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Do you think Olivia's father did the right thing by saying he wouldn't pay for his daughter's wedding? Do you think his decision was justified? What would you do if you were in his shoes?

Click here to read another story about a bride-to-be who prepared a dress for her wedding day but was forced to wear it to her fiancé's funeral instead.

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