Senior Woman Wins Big at the Races

Retirees are forced to be thrifty and make every cent of their pensions count, but how they sometimes earn extra money on the side may surprise you! 

The seniors in these next jokes are as shrewd as they are lucky. Remember never to underestimate those older than you, they've been around the block a time or two.

A bookie was counting out money for an old lady who’d won big at the races.

“Lady,” he said. “I just don’t understand. You say you don't know anything about horses, so how did you manage to pick the winner?”

The old lady patted her gray hair in place and responded timidly: “Really, I don’t know either. I usually just stick a pin in the paper and, well, there it is.”

The bookie took a deep breath.

“That’s all very well, lady,” he answered. “But how on earth did you manage to pick four winners yesterday afternoon then?”

“Oh,” replied the old lady.

“That was easy. I used a fork.”

Via Starts at 60

Here's another joke where the ends may or may not justify the means.

A 60-year-old millionaire is getting married and throws a big wedding reception.

His friends are quite jealous and in a quiet moment, one of them asks him how he landed such a hot 23-year-old beauty.

“Simple,” grins the millionaire, “I faked my age.”

His friends are really amazed and asked him what he said, thinking to themselves that he couldn't possibly pretend to be forty or even fifty because he hadn't aged as well as some of them had.

“Well”, he replied.

“I said I was 87!”

via Starts at 60

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