Daily Joke: Doctor Is Impressed When a Patient Describes His Typical Activity Level

Here’s a funny exchange between a doctor and his patient.

A

went to his doctor for his regular physical checkup. The doctor asks about the man’s daily activity level.

The patient said: "Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, marched up and down several rocky hills, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand, jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake and took four leaks behind big trees."

Inspired by the story, the doctor said, "You must be one hell of an outdoorsman!"

"No," he replied, "I'm just a shitty golfer."

If you laughed out loud, this another joke will keep you laughing for more.

An elderly lady went to the doctor with an interesting problem she wanted some help with. After her regular check-up, in which everything checked out fine, the lady pulled the doctor to the side and said,

“Doctor, I haven’t had sex for years now and I was wondering how I can increase my husband’s sex drive.”

Smiling, the doctor said, “Have you tried to give him Viagra?”

“Doctor, I can’t even get him to take aspirin when he has a headache,” she answered, frowning.

“Well,” the doctor continued, “Let me suggest something. Crush the Viagra into a powder. When you are giving him coffee, stir it into the coffee and serve it. He won’t notice a thing.”

Delighted, the old lady left the doctor’s office quickly, ready to follow his advice. Weeks later, she returned with a disappointed face. The doctor asked her what the matter was. She simply shook her head at him.

“How did it go?” he asked.

“Terrible, doctor, terrible,” she replied.

“Did it not work?” he asked, worried that he had given her the wrong advice.

“Oh yes,” the old lady said, ”It worked. I did as you said and he got up and ripped his clothes off right then and there and we made mad love on the table. It was the best sex that I’d had in 25 years.”

Confused, the doctor had to enquire further. “Then what is the problem, ma’am?”

“Well,” she said. “I can’t ever show my face in McDonald’s again."

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