My Lavatory Seat Is Cracked, Where Do I Stand? - Daily Joke
Sometimes, even the direst situations in life can seem so hilarious, we can't help laughing out loud. And while living a life where everything is in order is everyone's dream, it's a far-fetched call and easier said than done.
Have you ever found yourself writing to the local council with an endless list of complaints that are nothing but a growing nuisance in your life? We've all done so at some point in our life, but allow us to share with you a list of the funniest council complaint cases.
1. The bushes in my garden are quite tall around the front area and my back passage is laden with fungus.
2. My husband owns a large tool that sends vibrations in the entire house, and I'm sorry I can't tolerate it anymore.
3. If you ask me, it's the dog mess that I always have a hard time swallowing.
4. I'm writing to let you know that my cooker is broken and needs to be immediately repaired because it keeps backfiring and burning off my knob.
5. I want to file a very important complaint regarding my father. He was working in the yard yesterday and he injured his ankle very badly. Afterward, he put his foot in the hole in his back passage, and now I don't know what to do.
6. You have no idea what I'm going through - my neighbor's 18-year-old son is continually banging his balls against the fence.
7. I want to bring to your notice that the tiles from the outside toilet roof have gone missing. I'm not sure, but I guess it was a heavy wind the other night that might have blown them off.
8. My lavatory seat has cracks in it. Can you tell me where to stand?
9. I'm writing to you on behalf of my broken sink. It keeps coming away from the wall, and I don't know how to keep it in place.
10. Can you please take out time from your busy schedule and come have a look at my garden path? My wife lost her balance and fell on it yesterday and now she is expecting. I'd appreciate it if you can mend it soon.
11. I'm seeking your permission to remove my kitchen drawers. I can't see any good coming out of them.
12. Can you please come and have a look at my walls? 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have the plaster chipping off, and the remaining 50% are simply dirty.
13. I wish to inform you that I'm still experiencing trouble with smoke in my new drawers.
14. The toilet seems to be blocked and we're unable to bathe our kids until it gets cleared.
15. Can you kindly send over one of your workers to take a look at my water? It has a weird color and doesn't seem fit for drinking.
16. Just writing to bring to your notice that our lavatory seat was broken in half, and is now divided into three pieces.
17. I wish to file a complaint about the farmer who lives across the road. Every morning at 6 am, his clock's alarm starts blaring so loud, it ruins my sleep. I can't take it anymore.
18. My neighbor next door has a huge erection in his back garden, which is a disgusting and dangerous sight.
19. I'm writing to let you know that our kitchen floor is wet. We have two kids and are planning for a third one, so kindly send someone to have a look at it.
20. Hi. I'm an unmarried woman residing in a flat downstairs. Will you kindly take action about the noise made by the man on top of me every single night?
21. I'd appreciate it if you can send a man with the right set of tools to complete the job and make my wife satisfied.
22. Just wanted to bring to your notice that I have had the clerk of works down on the floor at least six times in a row, but I'm still not content.
23. Can you please send someone to have a look at our lavatory seat? It is broken and we're unable to get BBC2.
Some phrases from council complaint letters are true pearls that should be heard by other people. We hope that you enjoyed reading these.
Here's another joke that will make you laugh even more, and this one is a collection of phrases that can make your pregnant wife go crazy in just a few minutes. Warning: Only try one of these if you're strong enough to run for your life.