instagram.com/becauseadoption
Source: instagram.com/becauseadoption

Woman Meets Birth Mom in Hospice and Holds Her Hand, Hoping She'll Wake Up

Brittany Chalmers
Apr 07, 2022
01:00 P.M.
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When an adoptee found out her mother had been looking for her, she reached out and arranged a meeting. However, their reunion did not unfold as she expected. 

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Mary Herbert never hid away from the fact that she was adopted. It was something positive, and she was grateful for the happy childhood she had experienced. However, her life changed when she turned 18. 

Her adoptive parents handed her a folder with information from her adoption agency. She was thrilled to learn more about her past, but she also had many new questions.  

[Left] Mary Herbert as a baby; [Right] Herbert meets her birth mom for the first time. | Source: instagram.com/becauseadoption

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A CLOSED ADOPTION 

Herbert wondered about her birth mom and decided to look for her, but the journey was not easy because her adoption was closed. The agency revealed that Herbert's birth mother had called and asked about her once. 

However, when the agency reached Herbert's birth mother, she did not respond. Herbert persevered and searched the internet for answers—she saw something unbelievable online. 

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SHE FOUND HER MOM

Someone was looking for a child that matched Herbert's description. She said: "I put my hands around my computer monitor in shock. Was this me? Had I found the person looking for me?" 

Herbert had indeed found her birth mother, and she reached out via email. It was a terrifying moment, but she was thrilled when she got a reply. Herbert shared

"I called the number my birth mother had left in the return email. She answered. We spoke for an hour, maybe closer to an hour and a half, and the entire experience was what I had hoped for."

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THEIR COMMUNICATION STOPPED

Sadly, the communication between Herbert and her birth mom stopped, and she was heartbroken. Herbert went on with her life, but she never stopped dreaming about meeting her birth mom face to face.  

She sent her birth mom casual messages over the years, and one day, she gathered the courage to phone her. The woman picked up and agreed to meet with her, to her surprise. However, she never showed up. 

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HER BIRTH MOM WAS SICK 

Herbert was sad, but she believed they would meet someday when the timing was right. In 2020, she got a surprising text from her birth mother's number. It was from a loved one, and he revealed that she was ill. 

After many ups and downs, Herbert learned that her birth mom wanted to speak with her. One chat turned into daily calls until her birth mom was transferred to a hospice where Herbert visited her—it was a moment she would never forget.   

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HER BIRTH MOM NEVER WOKE UP

Herbert held her birth mom's hand in the hospice, and she expressed: "I stayed for the majority of the day, not even leaving to go to the restroom, as I didn't want to miss a moment if she woke up. She never did."   

During her birth mother's illness, Herbert discovered that she had siblings and connected with them. It was the silver lining to her story, and she was grateful to have found them. 

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ANOTHER EMOTIONAL REUNION 

Many children who are adopted have a natural curiosity about their birth parents. Hannah Nichole always knew she was adopted, and while she adored her adoptive family, she wanted to meet her biological mom and dad. 

Fortunately, she was able to do so, and she is grateful for her extended family. The reunifications were not always easy, but she shared

"Looking at my life now, and how many wonderful people I’ve been blessed to be connected to, has had a tremendous impact beyond words."

Nichole and Herbert's stories are inspiring. The women saw the positives of adoption and encouraged others with their resilience.  

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