Danielle Fishel, who portrayed Topanga Lawrence-Matthews on the teen sitcom "Boy Meets World," said she blames herself for needing to stop breastfeeding her newborn son Adler during his recovery.
Fishel and her husband Jensen Karp welcomed their son Adler on June 24. The baby remained in the NICU for three weeks after doctors noticed he had fluid retained in his lungs.
In a recent interview with PEOPLE, the actress said she blamed herself for Adler's sickness.
He had chylothorax, which Fishel depicted as a "leak in the lymphathic system" that was worsened by breast milk.
"I had this feeling instantly of somehow it was my fault," said Fishel.
Because of their child's condition, the couple needed to "take him off of breast milk and put him on a specially formulated formula that doesn't use the lymphatic system."
"This milk that I'm producing that's supposed to keep him alive and is supposed to be the healthiest thing for him is the thing that's keeping him in the hospital," she said. "I just felt like it was somehow my fault. Even though I knew that wasn't really rational, it's hard."
Fishel proceeded with that she felt like a "failure" for not having the option to nurture her child.
"You want your body and everything you do as a mom to be functioning optimally for your baby and when it's not, you feel like a failure," she said. "There was a little bit of a mourning process and a grieving process for me there."
But she currently feels better about the entire thing. She said:
"Now that I've come to terms with it and I know that hopefully the plan is that I get to transition back to breast milk in the next few weeks, I'm feeling much better about that. We'll see how it goes."