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Daily Joke: One-Liners Every Mother Can Understand

Joe Akins
By Joe Akins
May 01, 2021
05:30 A.M.

Are you a mom? Here are one-liners you can understand and relate to. Motherhood is definitely a lot of work, but most mothers have learned to do it with pride since their kids bring them so much joy anyways.

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You know you're really a mom when...

1. You count the sprinkles you put on each of your kid's cupcakes because you don't want a fight.

2. You are always ready to fight your kid's battles even if it involves another child.

A teacher putting a student through his work in the classroom | Photo: Shutterstock

A teacher putting a student through his work in the classroom | Photo: Shutterstock

3. You have just enough time to shave only one leg every now and then.

4. You tend to hide in different rooms in your house, especially the bathroom, to get some alone time to yourself.

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5. Whenever your child throws up, you can't sleep.

6. Someone else's child throws up at a party, and you keep eating.

Photo of young children raising hands. | Photo: Freepik

Photo of young children raising hands. | Photo: Freepik

7. You do consider finger paint to be a controlled substance.

8. You have the skill of putting food on a plate while making sure nothing touches it.

9. Your child asks that you read to him or her out loud in public, and you do it.

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10. You hire a babysitter because you and your partner have not been on a date in a while, then you end up dedicating half of the night talking about and checking on the kids.

Photo of a boy listening to the teacher | Photo: Pexels

Photo of a boy listening to the teacher | Photo: Pexels

11. You are praying ketchup is a vegetable because it's the only thing your child eats.

12. You are losing your mind over the thought of your son bringing home his first girlfriend.

13. Now, the thought of him bringing home a wife is even worse and it kills you.

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14. You notice you have been cutting your husband's sandwiches into unusual shapes.

15. You fast-forward through a movie when there is any form of violence.

A photo of students with their report cards. | Photo: Shutterstock

A photo of students with their report cards. | Photo: Shutterstock

16. You do not want to let go when your child holds you tight while leaving for school and you are mad when your child doesn't come back on time.

17. You won't even think of giving away your child's baby clothes.

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18. You hear your mother's voice coming out of your mouth when you say, "Not in your good clothes."

19. You have stopped criticizing your mother's methods of raising kids because you realize that you're turning to her already.

Little kids raising their hands in class | Photo: Unsplash

Little kids raising their hands in class | Photo: Unsplash

20. You saw in a magazine that the average 5-year-old asks about 437 questions a day and feels proud and happy that your kid is "above average."

21. You tell yourself every day, "I'm not cut out for this job," but you know you wouldn't trade it for anything.

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