Man Looks at His Son’s Skin & Takes DNA Test behind Wife’s Back – Then the Wife Finds Out

A white man doubted his son's paternity because he looked darker than his black mother and nothing like him, so he secretly got a DNA test. It backfired when his wife found out and chose to take a break from their marriage while suspecting him of being racist.

A white man got into a relationship with a black woman, and they welcomed one child before and another one after getting married. However, the first child's skin looked darker than his mother's and didn't match his father's.

He had no issues with his second child because she looked like him. The father had doubts about his firstborn but chose to trust his wife until other people questioned the child's paternity, and he finally got a DNA test.

He started accepting his first child only after getting the test results, and their relationship and the one he shared with the child's mother improved drastically. When he confessed to secretly getting a DNA test, his wife lost it — here's their story.

How One Man Went Behind His Wife's Back to Get a DNA Test for His Child

On May 9, 2020, a Reddit user with the username throwRAbiologicalkid went into one of the communities seeking advice on whether he was the wrong person in the following situation. He revealed he was a 29-year-old white man while his wife was black and 30.

The couple welcomed their first child, a five-year-old baby boy, a year into their relationship. The parent said, "When my son was born, I accepted him as mine. However, I couldn't help noticing how little he looked like me."

The doubts stemmed from his son not looking half-white as he had skin darker than the poster's wife. These uncertainties about his son's paternity were also fueled by the questions he got from those close to him, with him saying:

"My family and friends have asked if I'm sure he's mine."

However, he chose to trust his wife and loved his son regardless. When their son was two, their daughter, now three, was born, and her father didn't doubt her paternity. She looks just like him and has the same blue eyes that match his.

He bonded easier and quicker with her because there were no doubts about her paternity; the same happened with his family. The poster said his daughter's resemblance to him convinced him that his son wasn't his.

throwRAbiologicalkid shared how he'd always tried to treat his children equally because he saw them as his children. However, it dawned on him that he was starting to resent his son and felt it unfair to be caring for someone else's child.

The poster noted that while he and his wife had married because she'd gotten pregnant, they had been lucky to have a happy marriage. However, he soon began resenting his wife as he felt she'd betrayed him and eventually secretly got a DNA test done for his son. He felt relief when the test proved the boy was his, and four months later, his relationship with his wife and son had "improved dramatically."

Taking the test made him feel closer to his son now that he knew the boy was his. His relationship with his wife had progressed so much in a positive way that they discussed having a third child.

However, he hated keeping the DNA test a secret and eventually confessed to his wife, thinking she'd understand since their son didn't look like him. Instead, she became very upset and questioned if he'd ever doubted their daughter's paternity.

When his answer came out as no, she called him a racist, which he denied, and explained how he doesn't prefer his daughter due to her "whiter features," but because he knew she is his. The man's wife also accused him of making their son feel unloved for years for no reason.

However, throwRAbiologicalkid disputed that, saying he treated the boy like his own even when he didn't believe he was. His wife wished to leave after the COVID-19 pandemic quarantine and wanted to take their children along with her.

"My wife says she wants to leave and take our children after the quarantine," the poster wrote. A week and a half later, the poster was still sleeping on the couch despite him having hoped his wife would've calmed down by then.

His wife was so furious with him for not trusting her and denying their son — in her eyes — due to his dark skin. She only spoke to him when it pertained to their children, and he was desperate not to lose his family; hence he'd reached out to Reddit to find out if he was terrible for having had doubts about his son.

A month later, throwRAbiologicalkid returned to the same platform with an update about his relationship. Things went downhill after their altercation, but the poster hoped they would make it work.

What Happened After His Wife Found Out about the DNA Test?

The 29-year-old man returned to Reddit with an update on June 12, 2020, noting how he hadn't planned to return after being called out by the social media platform's users. He said he and his wife had separated, and he'd moved out to live with his parents while his family stayed in their house.

The social media user couldn't see his children as often as he wished, but when a more stable living situation was arranged, he and his wife planned on having joint custody. He noted how complex the situation had been on him and the children he spoke to nightly.

The father of two couldn't imagine seeing his son on the news as a victim of racial profiling.

What broke his heart was when the children kept asking when he was coming home, and he couldn't answer. The little girl struggled the most with the change, and he felt awful and missed his family and seeing the children daily.

He also missed his wife, as she'd said she needed space to process what happened. He didn't know if she'd forgive him, despite apologizing in all the ways he knew how. He'd finally decided to give her space, hoping she'd calm down.

The poster didn't want them to throw away what they'd built and believed divorce would shatter their children. However, his wife was keen on getting couples counseling, which gave him hope to work past this issue.

The father of two admitted that he now saw how he subconsciously harmed his son but said it wasn't his intention to be racist. However, he realized that he did treat his son differently due to his skin color and was ashamed of what his wife told her family since they held him in high regard. He stated:

"Now they all probably think I'm a racist."

The poster knew he had to be more aware of his actions, and his children deserved a haven in their family, free from racism. He feared what they'd be exposed to in the world where they could be racially profiled.

The father of two couldn't imagine seeing his son on the news as a victim of racial profiling. He closed his post by vowing not to let anything get in the way of his relationship with his son again.

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