February 08, 2019

Joke: Elderly Lady Went to Doctor for a Check-up and Asks How to Increase Husband’s Sex Drive

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An elderly woman went to get a check-up. The advice she got led to way more than she bargained for.

After a regular check-up, an elderly lady was told that she was in good health. Still, there was one thing she needed help with. 

She asked: 

"Doctor, I haven't had sex with my husband for several years now. I was hoping you could advise me on what I could do." 

Doctor and patient | Photo:Shutterstock


The doctor smiled at her and answered: "Have you tried to give him Viagra?"

The lady was dishearted: "Doc, I can't even convince him to take aspirin for his headaches." 

But the doctor had an idea: 

"Well what you can do is try crushing the viagra into powder. Then as you're preparing his coffee, stir it in and give it to him. He won't even see it coming." 

The old lady was pleased with the suggestion and left in a hurry to try it out. 

Elderly couple gazing at the sky | Photo: Shutterstock


Some weeks later, she came back for another checkup. This time, she seemed even more upset about something.

The doctor prodded, "What's wrong?" But the lady just shook her head. The doc asked again: "How did it go?"

She finally responded: 

"Terrible, doctor, terrible." 

The doctor was surprised. "It didn't work?" she asked. 

The old lady responded: 

"Yes, it certainly did. I did exactly what you said and he immediately got up and took his clothes off right then and there. We made love right on the table. It was the most amazing sex I'd had in 25 years." 


Elderly couple exchanging a glance at a restaurant | Photo: Shutterstock

The doctor was curious: "Then what is the problem, ma'am?" 

The old lady turned red as she said: 


"Well, I won't ever be able to show my face in McDonald's again!"

Here's another joke about a man who died and went to hell. While there, Satan shows up and walks him down a hallway. As they walk, the man is shown a selection of doors.

Man afraid of scary claw | Photo: Shutterstock

The first door was unappealing, as was the second. The third revealed a vast chasm of a few people standing knee deep in excrement drinking coffee. That's what the man chose but soon enough, he finds out it was by far the worst choice.