Top jokes about where babies come from

Having children is often dubbed as the most beautiful miracle in life.

While everybody is different from each other, all families have at least one funny story addressing children. Due to their innocence, those tales become even more hilarious. Here’s a compilation of jokes about the youngest members of the families to lighten things up a bit.

LEARNING HOW PUPPIES ARE MADE

A father and his 6-year-old son are walking down the street, and they come across two dogs having sex.

The boy is shocked by what he sees and asks his father "Daddy, what are they doing?"

The father, not wanting to lie to his son, says "they're just making a puppy."

"OK," says the son, and the father is relieved that he doesn't probe further.

The next day, the son bursts into his parents' room and sees them having sex.

The father jumps up and quickly covers himself.

Knowing he's in for an interesting talk, walks downstairs with him and they sit at the dining room table.

His son asks him "Daddy, what were you and mommy doing?"

Again, wanting to be honest with his son, he says, "me and mommy were making a baby."

His son pauses for a moment, thinking, and then replies

"Flip mommy over; I want a puppy!"

SIMILAR BUT NOT QUITE THE SAME

Children in the back seat can cause accidents.

Accidents in the backseat can cause children.

One of the most uncomfortable – yet common – questions that parents have to answer is the famous: “where do babies come from?” If you have not experienced it yet, here are a couple of ways to answer, as well as some examples of how not to do so.

THE INTERNET IS ALWAYS HELPFUL

- "Dad, where do babies come from?"

- "Amazon"

- *thinking for a while* "OK” 

THAT'S ONE WAY TO PUT IT

- "Dad, where do babies come from?"

- "Some say a swirling hell portal on the outskirts of town. Others, from the bottom of a mystic lake."

HONEY, TURN THE TV ON

- “Mama, where do babies come from?"

- "OK, I think it's time to watch ‘Look Who's Talking.’" 

THE MILLENNIAL WAY

A Millennial father sitting down to give his child “the talk.”

- “Son, I think it's time you learned about the eggplant emojis and the peach emojis.”

SIRI, C'MON

“Siri, where do babies come from?”

*Me half-awake in the kitchen* - “Nooooooooooooooo!!! God noooooooooooo!”

NOT QUITE ACCURATE

My son just asked me where babies come from. Long story short, he now thinks if you kiss a girl, you get a baby. 

THE PROJECT

- “Dad, where do babies come from?”

- “I feel very lucky to have worked on this project with your mother.”

AVOIDING A BULLET

*At lunch with my child*

- “Mom, please, pass the fries. Oh, and where do babies come from?”

- “Do you want a milkshake?!”