September 29, 2021
A man offered to let his best friend get married on his property, but when her fiancé found out they used to date, he uninvited him to the wedding. Now, the couple still wants to get married on his property without him, but the man refuses, and now he doesn't know if he did the right thing.
Reddit user weddingproperty thought he was doing his best friend a favor by letting her get married in his backyard. However, when her fiancé found out about their past, he uninvited the Redditor but still insisted they use his house for the wedding reception.
Becoming friends with someone you once went out with isn't easy. But if you manage to make it work, you may end up with a friend for life. Reddit user weddingproperty thought that he had done that, but when his best friend's fiance found out about their past, he gave her an ultimatum that took everyone by surprise.
BEST FRIEND'S UNEXPECTED REQUEST
Reddit user, weddingproperty, and his best friend, Carla, went out when they were in college, but things didn't work out, and they stayed friends. When the user got married, he told his wife about the history between him and Carla, and they continued to be friends.
When Carla got engaged, she asked him if she could get married in his backyard because it was private and had a lot of open space. The man said yes, but then Carla's fiancé, Rick, found out they used to go out, which angered him. He decided to continue with the wedding as long as Carla would agree to uninvite the Redditor.
To his surprise, the couple still wanted to use his home as a wedding venue despite their disputes. They suggested that he and his wife leave their home to accommodate the wedding. The Redditor refused to allow it and told them to find a new venue, but now some of his friends claim that he's "sabotaging" the wedding.
One Redditor suggested that Rick is purposefully putting Carla in an impossible position so that he has an excuse to call off the wedding. While another user named Unsre4evr replied,
"NTA, that's not how this works! You don't get to be uninvited from a wedding that is literally in your backyard. You are being incredibly kind and they are being incredibly rude. Either you are allowed to come or they need to find a different venue. Wow! How entitled can you get??"
For the most part, weddingproperty had the support of the Reddit community. According to them, he did nothing wrong and had no reason to feel bad about his decision. Also, it's worth noting that there's a certain etiquette that you need to follow if you're not going to invite someone to a wedding, and neither Rick nor Carla did that.
SHOULD EXES BE INVITED TO THE WEDDING?
Is it appropriate to invite your ex to your wedding? If your ex is now a close friend and you're about to tie the knot, then there's no harm in inviting them. As long as your partner knows about the history between the two of you and is comfortable with it, then there's nothing wrong with inviting them to your wedding.
However, if you (or your ex) still have some residual feelings, it can make things awkward. This usually depends on when you broke up. If it's an old relationship, it may be appropriate to ask them to come to your wedding, but if the breakup is relatively recent, then sending them an invite may be a bad idea.
Most people prefer to steer away from inviting their exes to their wedding. By not extending them an invite, they avoid making other people at the wedding uncomfortable. At the end of the day, it'll depend on how the groom and the bride feel about the ex being there and whether they're okay with it.
From the ex's perspective, seeing a former love marry someone else can be weird even if you've grown close with them and agreed to stay friends. Deciding whether or not to go can be tricky. If there's any chance that you may still have some lingering feelings for someone, then you should immediately decline their wedding invitation.
You will unnecessarily put yourself through a potentially traumatic experience, and you risk ruining someone's big day. Whichever way you look at it, going to an ex's wedding will be awkward, and you have to really think hard about whether or not you want to put yourself through that.
FIANCEE WANTS TO INVITE EX TO OUR WEDDING
Reddit user weddingthrowaway122's fiancée asked him if she could invite not one but several of her previous lovers to their wedding. The man planned on inviting only his immediate family and close friends to their ceremony, then his wife sprung this request on him. In the post, he explained:
"The issue I find myself running into is, I just can't make myself feel okay about her inviting these guys to our wedding, simply because of the fact that they've had [expletive]with my soon to be wife in the past and it's weird for me."
The user's fiancé thought that he was "silly" for raising his concerns, and some of the people in the community agreed with her. They highlighted that his wife is still in her early 20s, so all of her past relationships happened when she was a teenager, and the user has nothing to be concerned about.
The relationship between exes is complicated. Some people manage to make it work and build lifelong friendships, while others end up with a lot of hate and resentment. And even those who do figure it out may still be harboring some hidden feelings which could spill out at any time. It's all just one big land mine.
There's an etiquette that comes with planning the perfect wedding, and not inviting your ex is top of the list, which explains why so many people decide not to do it. However, we'd love to hear from you. What do you think about these stories? Please leave a comment and let us know.