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An elderly woman | Wedding invitations | Source: Flickr.com
An elderly woman | Wedding invitations | Source: Flickr.com

Mom Begs Son to 'Invite' His Dead Brother & Sisters to His Wedding

Vanessa Seifert
Aug 08, 2023
04:45 P.M.

A 26-year-old woman, in the middle of planning her wedding, was shocked when her mother-in-law requested she reserve seats for three dead people at her wedding ceremony.

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Weddings are about bringing families together, but sometimes, meeting some of the family members' requests can be challenging. A 26-year-old woman planning to wed her 27-year-old fiancé expressed how difficult it was for her to meet her future mother-in-law's request on Reddit.

The fiancée was excited to embark on this journey with her future husband. She expressed how much she and her family loved him. She also got along with his family to a certain extent.

Wedding invitations | Source: Flickr.com

Wedding invitations | Source: Flickr.com

For a bit of a backstory, the 26-year-old shared that her mother-in-law had two sons — her fiancé and his older brother. She fell pregnant three times between them but ended up with either a late miscarriage or a stillborn child. Therefore, the grieving process was not easy for her, so she poured all her love into her youngest son.

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As the young couple worked on their guest list, they consulted with their family members about who they would like to invite, and the mother-in-law asked for something they did not see coming.

An elderly woman | Source: Flickr.com

An elderly woman | Source: Flickr.com

She requested that her late children be invited to the wedding. The fiancée was confused and asked what she meant. The mother explained that she wanted three seats, each with a picture of one of her three late children, at the wedding.

The Fiancée Reaction to Her Mother-in-Law's Request

"I was horrified," expressed the fiancée. The 26-year-old had many reasons to object to the request. Firstly she and her fiancé planned a small and intimate wedding of about 30-50 people.

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Guests at a wedding | Source: Flickr.com

Guests at a wedding | Source: Flickr.com

So, the places reserved were meant for all their friends and family, and sacrificing three seats for people she had never met would limit the space they had for other guests.

Her future husband agreed and tried to meet his mother halfway by suggesting they put the three pictures on one seat. But despite the compromise, the 26-year-old was still not completely comfortable with the situation as it felt like a dark way to start a future with her husband.

A couple | Source: Flickr.com

A couple | Source: Flickr.com

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However, she was also conflicted because her in-laws were taking care of 75% of her wedding expenses, and that was the only request her fiancé's mother had made. So, the 26-year-old turned to Reddit users to ask if she was wrong to refuse to meet her mother-in-law's demands.

Commenters Give the Fiancée Advice

One Reddit user said they worked as an event planner and that it was not unusual for people to have outrageous requests at weddings or funerals. Still, the person thought having framed pictures of the children was a "hard no."

Another person came up with the idea to at least frame the three names and include them in the wedding decor and ceremony as a simple way to pay tribute to the fiancé's siblings.

Comments from Reddit users | Source: Reddit.com

Comments from Reddit users | Source: Reddit.com

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Comments from Reddit users | Source: Reddit.com

Comments from Reddit users | Source: Reddit.com

However, the commenter still had reservations about the mother-in-law's request and thought she would be giving the couple a tough time in the future if she already had such shocking requests.

One other netizen clarified that the 26-year-old must not feel guilty because the wedding must be about her and her future husband. They also added that having empty seats reserved for dead people would scare their guests.

Comments from Reddit users | Source: Reddit.com

Comments from Reddit users | Source: Reddit.com

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In fact, the commenter did not agree with her fiancé for trying to find a compromise because their wedding day was not the time for the kids to be honored. The Reddit user advised her to have a serious conversation with her fiancé about having clear boundaries with their parents.

Here is another story about a wedding gift that had a mother disinvited from her daughter's wedding.

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